The Cemetery Club blog

Just published a new book!

2011-08-28T21:27:00.001-07:00

While it's not prosey, it is helpful. It's called the "Cemetery Journal," and it's a great tool for you to use to log your cemetery research in while you make your way through the graveyard.

From the back cover: "If you spend your free time in cemeteries, you’re probably a taphophile (someone with a passion for cemeteries). And if you’re a taphophile, the odds are good that you enjoy researching them. From genealogists to historical researchers, this journal will help you keep track of all your cemetery information, grave by grave and cemetery by cemetery."

Check it out at: http://www.lulu.com/product/paperback/cemetery-journal/16691555

Let me know what you think!

Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

Another new video

2011-08-23T14:52:00.001-07:00

This one is a commercial for one of the many presentations I give.

Check this video out -- Cemetery Secrets - Presentations by Minda Powers-Douglas http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ynxTRFBCW5E&feature=share

Enjoy!

Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

Authors wanted!

2011-08-22T21:40:00.001-07:00

Are you a non-fiction author of a cemetery book? TheCemeteryClub.com wants to review your book! Contact me to send a review copy. Non-fiction books relating to death or grieving are welcome, as well as poetry within this theme.

-Minda

minda.epitaphsmag@gmail.com

Do you love cemeteries? Do you have a video camera?

2011-08-22T21:19:00.001-07:00

If you answered "yes" to both these questions, then check out my video announcing the contest with your chance to have your own cemetery show hosted on www.TheCemeteryClub.com. And, yes, my spokesperson is a puppet (cemetery people have to have a sense of humor).

http://youtu.be/nNVnwfnMDkY

I can't wait for the entries to start coming in!

Happy cemetery haunting!

Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

New cemetery PSA

2011-08-22T20:52:00.001-07:00

I just finished a public service announcement on cemeteries and posted it on YouTube. This is my first use of iMovie in a few years. I didn't forget everything!

The cemetery featured in the video is Chippiannock Cemetery in Rock Island, Illinois. If you haven't visited it in person, you really should.

Check it out and let me know what you think.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7gw8ZV3RBgI

Happy cemetery haunting!

-Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

It's done!

2011-05-31T15:20:00.001-07:00

My new version of www.thecemeteryclub.com is live! Epitaphs Magazine Online is finally launched!

Laurel Hill Cemetery is recipient of a Preservation Achievement Award for restoration of Old Mortality Sculptural Group

2011-03-30T10:01:00.001-07:00

Laurel Hill Cemetery is recipient of a Preservation Achievement Award for restoration of Old Mortality Sculptural Group

http://bit.ly/hPEmyd

Latest cemetery and related news

2011-03-03T07:59:00.001-08:00

Last U.S. veteran of World War I passes away

http://www.salon.com/news/feature/2011/02/28/us_obit_last_wwi_veteran_1/index.html

African-American Cemetery News - blog

http://africanamericancemeteries.com/news/

Poor stacked in mass graves in Illinois cemetery

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2011/02/17/ap/national/main20033141.shtml

Westboro funeral pickets are protected speech, high court rules

http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2011/03/02/westboro-funeral-pickets-protected-speech-high-court-rules/

Excellent article. 'The way we grieve now'

2010-09-14T21:01:00.001-07:00

I just read an excellent article on grieving via Yahoo's Shine section. The examples it uses are celebrities, but there stories are no less touching than those of the average Jane's. Definitely worth a read.

It's been more than 11 years since my grandfather died, and I still feel the heart-stinging grief occasionally. I miss him greatly and wish he'd had the chance to meet my husband and especially our daughter. He would have been over the moon about her. It amazes me that the two people in my life who mean so much to me--my husband and daughter--never knew my Grandpa. He played such an important role in my life growing up; it just doesn't make sense on that inside level of me.

Wishing you love and joy,
Minda

'The way we grieve now' http://www.shine.yahoo.com/channel/life/the-way-we-grieve-now-2389801/

Green-Wood Cemetery - Artists of Permanent Residence - Sept. 17-19

2010-09-14T10:12:00.001-07:00

Green-Wood Cemetery

Subject: Artists in Permanent Residence @ Green-Wood 9/17-9/19/10

We have just added a spectacular new gallery exhibit, Artists of Permanent Residence, featuring select works of over 300 artists who call Green-Wood their final resting place.

This is a FREE sneak peek into the art collection of The Green-Wood Historic Fund and is up for a very limited engagement:

Friday, Sept. 17 through Sunday, Sept. 19, 2010––9 AM-7PM
at The Historic Chapel @ Green-Wood (500 25th St @ 5th Ave. in Brooklyn, NY) For more information and directions, visit http://www.facebook.com/l/28534hd8L9e3hqHT9e0GNIC6D3A;greenwoodcemetery.org

Upcoming cemetery-related events

2010-09-12T20:14:00.001-07:00

You won't want to miss these upcoming events! And, if you go, e-mail your experience to me for posting on my blog!

• The 2010 Gravediggers' Ball - Oct. 15, Philadelphia, Pa. http://thelaurelhillcemetery.org/

• Sleepy Hollow Cemetery, Sleepy Hollow, New York - fall walking tours and photography workshops. http://sleepyhollowcemetery.org/news-events/

• Historic Oakland Cemetery, Atlanta, Georgia
     - Sunday in the Park, Oct. 3, noon to 6 p.m.
     - Halloween Tour, Oct. 22, 23, 24
     - Run Like Hell 5K (Heck for the kids) benefit run for the cemetery, Oct. 30, 9 a.m. - http://www.oaklandcemetery.com/run.html

• 11th annual Dia de Los Muertos - Hollywood Forever Cemetery, Hollywood, Calif. - Oct. 30, 2 p.m. to midnight http://www.ladayofthedead.com/

• 2010 Day of the Dead calendar - http://diadelosmuertos.us/article/2010-day-of-the-dead-calendar

More events will be posted as I find them, receive them, etc.!

Wishing you joy,
Minda

Sharon Creech is my new hero

2010-08-27T14:08:00.001-07:00

This post is not necessarily cemetery-related, but, then again, just about everything is death-related if you think about it. So it is related in a way.

I'm a big fan of books on CD. I'm also a big fan of books in general, and you will rarely find me without one. But books on CD (now that I have my own car again--hubby and I shared one while he was unemployed) are wonderful things I enjoy immensely while in my car. Recent favorites include "Curse Workers: The White Cat" by Holly Black and "The Opposite of Invisible" by Liz Gallagher.

But my most favorite and treasured one is the one I just finished yesterday: "Walk Two Moons" by Sharon Creech. It is glorious and delicious.

My current favorite books to listen to (and read) are from the young adult section. Just because they are written for younger people doesn't mean they lack in quality. In fact, I think that they can have more depth and insight to them than the average book written for an adult. Teens and younger people are constantly trying to figure themselves out. They know they are always in flux--that they are changing as much as the world around them. And they are working their way through it. There's a lot of introspection going on.

We adults are more concerned with the day-to-day drudgery than a kid. How am I going to pay the bills? When am I going to get a job? What are we going to do when the baby comes? What groceries do I need to buy? Are we out of toilet paper? Did I leave the stove on?

Kids, though, are thinking: Does he like me? Why did my best friend stop talking to me? Am I too ugly? Am I smart? Am I stupid? Will I get asked to the dance? Will she notice me? Does anybody notice me?

Yes, adults think of some of these things, too. But think back to when you were a kid. These things weighed on your mind like crazy. It wasn't about taking care of everyone else or providing for them (though there are kids who have those worries piled on them, too: Will mom ever get better? What if I have to choose between my parents? What will happen to me?).

This is one of the reasons why I like youth lit. Another is because there are a lot of cool ghost stories. Youth lit is all about the "what if" world. What if ghosts DO exist? What if vampires exist ... and I go to school with one and fall in love with one? What if I find out I'm a wizard?

Oh, joy and rapture! How fantastic is that!

I have read a lot of different genres of books. I dig non-fiction because I'm a life-learner. I dig Stephen King because he's my hero from way back. I like some chick lit ("Bridget Jones' Diary") and even some mysteries. Even some police detective mysteries, though I do veer away generally from descriptions like "a serial killer is on the loose, and Detective Holly Winters may be next on the list." I also stay away from descriptions including the word "grisly." I can handle some graphic stuff if it works with the story, but seriously. Grisly?

So the next time you're at the library or your favorite bookstore, check out the young adult section. Really give the covers a look. You'll probably find something great. Then go to the "C" section and pick up Creech's "Walk Two Moons." You won't regret it.

Huzza! Huzza!

Wishing you inspiration and love,

Minda

2010-08-25T06:10:00.001-07:00

Kelton Family to be Recognized at Green Lawn

(Press release from Green Lawn Cemetery, Columbus, Ohio)

The Kelton family, whose home on East Town Street is a local tourist
attraction, will be featured at the Sept. 4 First Saturday at Green Lawn
program.

Georgeanne Reuter, director of the Kelton House, will present a slide
lecture on the Kelton House Museum & Garden and talk about the Kelton
family that is buried at Green Lawn. The family home in the East Town
Street Historic District has been restored and is maintained by the
Junior League of Columbus.

The program, free and open to the public, will be held at 11 a.m. in the
Huntington Chapel in the middle of Green Lawn, 1000 Greenlawn Ave

Reuter’s presentation will trace the home’s history through the eyes of
three generations who lived there, including the vision of Grace Kelton,
the last Kelton in residence, who left her home to the Columbus
Foundation with instructions to find an organization that would restore
the home to its 1850s appearance and create a museum of local history and
the decorative arts.

The slide show will feature in-process photographs of the Museum’s
restoration and the efforts of early volunteers to create a museum.
Attendees will see photographs of the Museum’s carriage house before it
was restored and the garden before its major revitalization. They will
also see photographs of the restored interiors, selected from authentic
styles of the mid-19th century and other components of the Museum’s
collection.

The presentation will also include discussions of the Museum’s
educational offerings: tours, lectures, holiday presentations, and the
programs offered by the Museum’s Underground Railroad Learning Station.

First Saturday at Green Lawn is a presentation of the Green Lawn
Volunteers and recognizes people buried at the state’s second-largest
cemetery for their role in local history.

The Keltons are among the 150,000 people buried at Green Lawn since it
was established Aug. 2, 1848. The cemetery covers 360 acres, 80 of which
are undeveloped.

For further information on the cemetery, visit www.greenlawncolumbus.org
or call the office at614-444-1123. Information about the Green Lawn
Volunteers can also be found on the Web page, by calling 614-266-5218 or
by e-mailing sandlot17@juno.com.

Green Lawn Cemetery
1000 Greenlawn Ave.
Columbus, Ohio 43223

www.greenlawncolumbus.org

Linda Burkey, General Manager
614-444-1123

Sandi Latimer, Volunteer Coordinator
614-878-4214 (home)
614-255-4218 (cell)

Philadelphia's Laurel Hill Cemetery: Classy Broads and Daring Dames: Marking the 90th Anniversary of the 19th Amendment

2010-08-18T07:21:00.001-07:00

Laurel Hill Cemetery in Philadelphia is the cemetery I want to spend quality time in. Actually, I want to WORK there. They always have amazing programs going on. And tonight's is going to be fantastic. Unfortunately I'll be in Illinois and hundreds of miles away. But if you live in or near Philly, YOU can attend this great event.

Classy Broads and Daring Dames: Marking the 90th Anniversary of the 19th Amendment *TWILIGHT TOUR* What do a ballerina, a sculptor, a maker of pyrotechnic devices, and a kindergarten leader have in common? First, they’re all buried at Laurel Hill Cemetery. Second, they all happen to be women whose accomplishments in life have been largely neglected, devalued and forgotten throughout history… But, we are now working to right this wrong, unearthing their stories, and ensuring that they are told for all to hear!

Wednesday, Aug. 18 - 6 p.m. - $20

Laurel Hill Cemetery
tel. 215-228-8200
fax. 215-228-7940
3822 Ridge Avenue
Philadelphia, PA 19132

http://www.thelaurelhillcemetery.org

NY Times: City Cemeteries Face Gridlock

2010-08-16T19:49:00.001-07:00

(Special thanks to Catmoves, who posted this on my Yahoo group interview_taphophile@yahoogroups.com.)

August 13, 2010

The New York Times

By MARC SANTORA

THOSE of us among the living all know New York City can be maddeningly expensive, whether one is shopping for a $40 million mansion on Fifth Avenue or a $2,500 studio walk-up in a former tenement on the Lower East Side.

For the dead, however, virtually no amount of money will secure a final resting place in the heart of a city that is fast running out of graveyard space.

And in the parts of town where a burial plot is still available, the cost has in some cases more than tripled in less than a decade; aboveground mausoleums can fetch upward of $3 million. Cemeteries are scrambling to create more space, and as plot prices have soared, the number of cremations has also risen, with a quarter of New Yorkers choosing the less expensive alternative.

Trinity Church Cemetery in Washington Heights, the last operating graveyard in Manhattan, has stopped selling plots, offering burial only in the most “extraordinary circumstances,” or to people with long-held reservations.

The largest Jewish graveyard in Brooklyn, Washington Cemetery, ran out of land in the winter after tearing up roads and pathways to utilize every cubic inch of ground. Evergreens and Cypress Hills, also in Brooklyn, may sprawl, but not enough, and dozens of smaller cemeteries spread across the five boroughs are squeezed, too. The city’s largest Catholic cemetery, Calvary in Queens, is close to capacity. And even the most famous of them all, Green-Wood Cemetery in Brooklyn, has only about five more years before it will be forced to stop selling plots.

More than 50 years have passed since a major cemetery was established within the city, and no new burial grounds are planned. But New Yorkers continue to die, some 60,000 a year.

Accordingly, per square foot, burial plots in centrally located cemeteries rival the most expensive real estate in the city. A private mausoleum at Woodlawn Cemetery in the Bronx can easily cost more than $1,000 per square foot.

“We have people who would like to disinter Mom and Dad and sell the graves back to make some money,” said Richard Fishman, the director of the New York State Division of Cemeteries.

There are state laws limiting the profits on resold graves, but the fact that people would be willing to go to such lengths, Mr. Fishman said, illustrates just how valuable burial plots have become.

“There is a serious shrinkage in the available grave space,” Mr. Fishman said. “How many years out for each individual cemetery depends on a number of factors, but space is definitely tight.”

Other major urban areas have taken measures to alleviate similar space crunches. London allows people to be buried upright, while cemeteries in Singapore and Sydney, among others, offer “limited tenure,” cemetery-speak for digging up bodies after a certain amount of time so that the plot can be reused.

New York City is not now contemplating graveyard evictions, although the state did pass a law several years ago that allows cemeteries to take over empty plots bought more than 75 years ago if the owner cannot be reached. Maple Grove in Queens has already reclaimed more than 150 graves, and many other cemeteries are taking similar action, state officials said.

In fact, cemetery operators have begun to resort to the kind of creative use of space that many a Manhattan landlord might envy — squeezing coffins into every barren inch, narrowing paths, stacking coffins nine-deep.

“We are apparently one of the first that ran out of burial space,” said Dominick Tarantino, who runs Washington Cemetery in Brooklyn, “but the other ones, I don’t think they are too far behind me.”

From his office, the rumble of the F train can be heard as it slices through the graveyard. Look in any direction from the elevated platform at the Bay Parkway stop, and the crowding is evident, with graves pushing up against auto-body shops, apartment buildings and busy intersections. The paths are just wide enough for a golf cart; the old roads were sacrificed to tombstones. Coffins have to be unloaded from hearses outside the gate.

“We have had bribes offered, sure,” Mr. Tarantino said. “But we have nothing to be bribed for. We have no room.”

Just as the architecture on a city street reveals the history of the time, so do the headstones in the graveyard, which was established in 1841. There are the extravagant monuments favored in the 1920s, reminders of the boom before the Depression. Tiny white sandstone markers — the “baby graves,” as the head groundskeeper, Charlie Anderson, calls them — pop up in clusters, their fading dates coinciding with various epidemics.

On newer headstones, almost uniformly made of black marble, etched portraits of the deceased stare out at visitors. This is the style favored by the Russian Jews from neighboring Brighton Beach, who have been pleading for more room to bury their dead.

The cemetery has made a bid on an adjacent house. Even though the owner is asking a hefty sum — $1.4 million, down from $1.8 million — for a small house that sits on less than an acre of land, it makes economic sense for the cemetery to buy it.

But before Washington acquires more turf, Mr. Tarantino has quite a few bureaucratic hurdles to clear, including securing the approval of the City Council.

“The city does not make it too easy for us to buy land for cemetery use,” he said one recent afternoon before heading off to meet with political leaders. If the cemetery does get the property, there is little doubt the plots will go quickly.

“Even if he could only make 400 new plots, they would sell in a week,” said Mr. Fishman of the Division of Cemeteries.

The price for a plot before the cemetery ran out of them was $12,000. New plots would very likely be even more expensive.

“Any little piece of land, we are really getting a premium for,” Mr. Tarantino said. And when he says little piece of land, he means that literally.

Despite the bulging waistlines that have necessitated bigger casket sizes across the country, Washington Cemetery is strict: no caskets more than 26 inches wide.

“They got to squeeze them into the box,” Mr. Anderson said.

The plots themselves are 30 inches wide, 7 feet long and 6 feet deep. They are so close to one another that as workers prepared a site for a burial earlier this month, they had to make sure that the coffins buried in neighboring plots did not tumble into the new grave.

It might seem that an enterprising developer could find a way to make a lucrative business out of providing burial space.

But that has not happened.

First, by law, cemeteries in New York State must be nonprofit institutions. There are 35 privately owned cemeteries in the city and several dozen with religious affiliations. The closer to Manhattan and major transportation, the more crowded and expensive a burial ground will be. Farther away, particularly in Staten Island and parts of the Bronx, space is available. The indigent of New York City are buried on Hart Island in Long Island Sound.

Woodlawn, which was part of Westchester County when it was founded in 1863 but was later incorporated into the Bronx, still has burial room. It hopes to be able to offer graves for another 40 to 50 years, but that relative abundance hasn’t kept its prices down.

“We want to have enough saved so that the income from the trust, once we are closed and have nothing left to sell, is enough to maintain the cemetery,” said John P. Toale Jr., the president of Woodlawn.

While there is a space crunch in the city, there is more space in the suburbs, and cemeteries in upstate New York can barely give away plots, state officials said. Many New Yorkers who struggled and saved to live in the city end up buried elsewhere.

Even as the broader real estate market languished in the recession, prices for graves in the city continued skyward. The state regulates the fees a cemetery can charge for services like excavation, but graves sell at market price. So burial plots are a cemetery’s revenue-generator.

However, the trust funds set up by cemeteries to provide income for operating costs have taken a hit, just as other institutional investments have. The number of people buying graves as part of estate planning has also dropped significantly, cemetery officials said. One reason for the decline is that 25 percent of all those who die in the city are opting to be cremated, up from 10 percent a little over a decade ago.

Prices vary from cemetery to cemetery. At land-rich Woodlawn, a single-depth grave for one starts at $6,995. A double-depth plot begins at $7,995, and a family plot ranges from $64,995 to $1.575 million.

At Green-Wood, the sprawling cemetery in Brooklyn, space is harder to come by, and entry-level prices for in-ground burial reflect this, starting at $11,000.

At Trinity’s graveyard in Washington Heights, in-ground plots are sold only in extraordinary circumstances, as when former Mayor Edward I. Koch asked that a special Jewish enclave be created in the Episcopal cemetery so that he could be laid to rest in the heart of the city he once ran. He paid $20,000 for the privilege.

Like other cemeteries short on space, Trinity has resorted to aboveground crypts, which start at $9,000.

Now that an end to plot sales is in sight, Green-Wood is seeking to transform its image, according to Richard J. Moylan, its president. The graveyard charges admission for guided tours, giving people a chance to saunter through time among the tombstones of the notable and the notorious. The hope is that it will become much like Père Lachaise cemetery in Paris, a magnet for tourists.

For now, though, most city cemeteries are not so much concerned with drawing the living as finding room for the dead.

And as is true in all real estate, it’s about location. Just as the apartment-hunter pays more to be near a park or to secure a sweeping view, the address within the cemetery often affects the price tag.

Being buried under a tree is more desirable than being out in the open. A plot that is easy to get to can be more valuable than one in the back 40. A neighborhood of ornate Victorian marble can cost more than an avenue of flat, mowable markers. And then there are the specific needs and wants of different cultural groups.

For instance, many Asians prefer to be buried on hilltops.

“The Chinese especially, they will literally buy the whole mountaintop,” Mr. Fishman said. “They would pay a fortune for that.”

Even a fortune, however, cannot buy a hilltop once there are no more hilltops to be bought.

Spirits in October - Riverside Cemetery, Macon, GA

2010-08-09T14:49:00.001-07:00

Oh, how I wish I lived closer to Macon, Georgia. I would love to take part in their Spirits in October events! I'm on their e-mail list, so I get the latest and greatest news about Riverside Cemetery in Macon. The text links probably won't work, but this one will take you to the site: http://bit.ly/cOw1vH

Here's the scoop:

Help us bring history to life...

...during guided tours of Riverside Cemetery's premiere event, Spirits in October! Past participants have reported "finding a deeper connection to the past...and stories I will not forget."

This event is produced by a partnership of Historic Riverside Cemetery Conservancy, Historic Macon and Cox Capitol Theatre. Proceeds from the event benefit these three non-profit organizations.

For more information, visit our website or the Spirits in October Facebook page, email us, or contact us at (478) 742-5328.

Spirits in October needs YOUR help!!!

Sister Mary Edward (Katie Manning) hands out candy to good girls and boys

We need volunteers for our third annual Spirits in October event. If you enjoy history, speak well in public, can be a gracious host, or just appreciate the intangible benefit that comes from helping to preserve one of our community's most treasured landmarks, then, one (or all) of the areas below might be perfect for you!

Live in or near Macon, GA? Volunteer for Spirits in October at Riverside Cemetery! http://bit.ly/cOw1vH

If you participate, let me know how it goes!

Minda

minda.epitaphsmag@gmail.com

Cemeteries and events in the news

2010-07-27T11:30:00.001-07:00

Check out the latest stories about cemeteries and cemetery events in the news:

• NPR story: Scientists Stalk Cemeteries For Signs Of Wildlife http://n.pr/awKpqH http://n.pr/awKpqH

• Lauren Hill Cemetery, Philadelphia - Wednesday, July 28, 6 p.m. - "A Twilight Tour & Toast to Our Famous Fishtowners" - cost is $20 for public, $17 for members, $15 for seniors/students - www.thelaurelhillcemetery.org

• Catholic Cemeteries Archdiocese of Chicago: http://www.catholiccemeterieschicago.org/cemeterynews.php

• Problems of neglect, ownership confusion linger at historic Lincoln Cemetery - Montgomery, Ala. -
http://africanamericancemeteries.com/news/

• McCaskill: Arlington Cemetery grave gaffe growing - http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/38419873/ns/us_news/

• Historic spotlight: Forest Llewellyn Cemetery - http://www.heartlandconnection.com/news/story.aspx?id=480329

• Skokie Cemetery tells father of Iraq war veteran Albert Bitton to take down flags - http://www.myfoxchicago.com/dpp/news/metro/skokie-cemetery-albert-bitton-war-veteran-flags-20100726

The latest: Philadelphia's Laurel Hill Cemetery records now online

2010-07-13T11:16:00.001-07:00

(info from their e-newsletter)

Laurel Hill Cemetery's Interment Records Are Now Available Online!

In the spirit of Independence Day, Laurel Hill Cemetery hereby declares our freedom from paper burial records! After years of planning, fundraising and hard work, our record of interments is finally available online!

Though our burial records are now digitized, our work is far from complete. We are in fact currently in the process of raising funds for the second phase of records digitization. The successful completion of this forthcoming phase will result in a digital copy of every lot file and interment record contained in Laurel Hill's Archives, from 1836 to the present day.

We now seek the support of our patrons, friends, lot holders, and the many genealogists and researchers who have used our Archives over the years. Please help us to realize the completion of our records digitization through a fully tax-deductible, charitable donation.

Final Submissions Deadline for 175 Years of Reflections booklet is approaching - July 30th

The Friends are in the process of preparing a commemorative booklet to mark Laurel Hill's 175th anniversary in 2011. Tentatively titled 175 Years of Reflections, Laurel Hill Cemetery, 1836-2011, this pocket-sized text will include personal recollections and artistic representations - both historic and contemporary - on or about our famed National Historic Landmark site. We welcome your submissions! They can include a piece of original, creative text about the Cemetery, such as a poem, the recounting of a personal experience had while here, or a meditation on what Laurel Hill means to you. Reflections can also include original renderings of the site, ranging from charcoal sketches, oil paintings, sculpture, collage, photography and mixed media. Visit the website for details: http://thelaurelhillcemetery.org/index.php?m=6&id=7

JULY EVENTS

Sat. July 24, 7pm

The Ghosts Among Our Graves:

A Paranormal Investigation of Laurel Hill

$30/per, $27/members, $25 seniors+students

Wed. July 28, 6pm

A Twilight Tour and Toast to Our Famous Fishtowners

$20/per, $17/members; $15 seniors+students

To register for any of our July events, please call (215) 228-8200 or email tours@thelaurelhillcemetery.org.

Riverside Cemetery event in Denver, CO

2010-07-13T09:09:00.001-07:00

Walk-A-Bout: "The Other Side of Riverside"
Saturday, July 17th at 9:00am.

Due to popular demand for this tour we are doing it again, this time with even more unusual people and monuments! And, to help celebrate Old Globeville Days there will be special emphasis on Globeville stories and the orthodox section of the cemetery.

Tour guide Jeff Stoffel will highlight some of Riverside's unsung and colorful residents. We'll also discuss the symbolism and materials of the monuments and art as well as some info on the flora and fauna of the park.

The walk starts at the office at 9 am and we'll wrap up by 11 am. Bring sunscreen, sun umbrella's, water and your walking shoes. Please keep in mind there are no facilities at Riverside.

After the tour take a short drive to the Orthodox Food Festival & Old Globeville Days for a cold drink and a plate of the best ethnic festival food in Denver.

Enjoy authentic food, entertainment and live music from Russia, Romania, Serbia, Ukraine, Eritrea, Greece & Mexico. Also enjoy a look at the historical landmark church with it's beautiful iconography. Co-presented by Holy Transfiguration Cathedral and the Globeville Civic Assn. more information, http://orthodoxfoodfestival.wetpaint.com/

The Event is held at Argo Park, right across the street Holy Transfiguration Orthodox Cathedral at 47th and Logan St. in Denver.

Both these events are free. We'll keep the tour to 20 people, please drop an email if you plan to attend the 9 am tour to events@friendsofriversidecemetery.org.

Learn More About the Globeville Story

Interested in learning more about Globeville? Check out the Globeville Story blog website written by Mary Lou Egan to find out more about the history of the area.

Contribute to The Riverside Scout: Stories and Ephemera of Denver's Oldest Cemetery

Board member Dave Cass sends word that he is looking for more stories about Riverside to post on our new website, The Riverside Scout. The Riverside Scout is dedicated to presenting stories and ephemera of Denver's Oldest Cemetery. Have a story you want to tell? Let Dave know by emailing him at history@friendsofriversidecemetery.org. Otherwise, check it out at 1876.friendsofriversidecemetery.org.

Contact Information

If you have an idea or suggestion we encourage you to get in touch with us:

Friends of Historic Riverside Cemetery
PO Box 16712
Denver CO 80216
friends@friendsofriversidecemetery.org

The Friends of Historic Riverside Cemetery is a volunteer-run 501 (c) (3) non-profit organization dedicated to increasing awareness and promoting preservation of Denver's oldest cemetery.

So what's next?

2010-07-08T11:42:00.001-07:00

In March 2010, my latest book came out, "Images of America: Chippiannock Cemetery." We had a wonderful book launch party at the Hauberg Civic Center in Rock Island, Illinois. The Center was originally John and Suzanne Hauberg's mansion. The Haubergs were major philanthropists in the area and are featured in the book.

Since then, I did a book signing tour of the Quad Cities. Borders, Barnes & Noble, the Village of East Davenport, Sam's Club ... I was a veritable Stephen King! Of cemetery books. LOL Maybe my books haven't sold millions (yet!), but I'm pretty happy.

The response I've received from people has been great. So many people who grew up around the cemetery bought the book and told me how much they learned about the monuments they used to play around as kids.

What means the most to me about writing is being able to share what I've learned with other people. It's actually an honor.

So what's next? What cemetery will I write about? What tales will I tell? Who or what will they be about?

In the works is a book about Oakdale Memorial Gardens in Davenport, Iowa. I'm also talking with some fellow taphophile friends about a book of cemetery photography by The Ladies of Cemetery Photography. I'd love to write a book about my favorite cemetery in New Orleans.

And don't forget that I'm working on getting the next issue of Epitaphs Magazine out. Yes, I'm starting to sound like a broken record about that! We've had a number of health issues, etc., in the family, and family comes first. So I am far from shouting about a deadline for it. But I will keep you posted. It's going to have some good stuff in it.

I can say that it felt really good a couple of weekends ago to get out in the cemetery and take photos. It had been a while.

As far as this weekend, I won't be hitting the cemetery. What I will be doing this weekend is performing the wedding ceremony for my cousin and his fiance. That's an honor for me, too.

Peace to all of you,

Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2007-10-28T21:36:00.000-07:00

The Effects of Full Moons on Lulu.com

Okay, so it's one full moon, and it most likely has nothing to do with my problems with Lulu.com. But ARGH! anyway.

I have been busting my butt, straining my eyes, wracking my brain, beating my head against the wall and all the other cliched things that people do out of frustration for the past three weeks. Issue 5 of Epitaphs is done. I finished designing it, edited it, proofed it, redid the photos a few times, adjusted things, saved and resaved. Taught myself all sorts of tricks I hope I will remember for the next issue. Crazy me, I thought it would be smooth sailing from here on. But no. No no no. Uploading PDFs, embedding fonts, resizing, making things right, making things more right ... oh my gosh the list goes on ... is taking forever and driving me nuts!

I am no techie, my friends. I glean what I can from people and then search like hell all over the Internet to teach myself how things work. My gosh, I searched and searched until I located Swift Publisher (which I do recommend for the non designers like myself). Then I worked my way through that software, figuring it out along the way. Then I researched Lulu.com. Decided to go with it, and struggled through that learning process. After THINKING I had loaded everything properly, I ordered my first "proof" copy. I waited impatiently for it to arrive. Only to find that I had loaded it IMPROPERLY and then paid $10 for two sheets of paper with my cover on it!

I was so proud of myself for finishing the magazine and having it available in the month I said it would be (and even the year, too!). Things aren't perfect, and I'm still working through them. Like links for the subscribers, breaking the news to subscribers that the magazine went bankrupt and has no money to send them printed issues anymore. (But, hey, they are receiving one free electronic issue for every paid for issue they have yet to receive, and that's a pretty sweet deal.) Some people are happy with the situation (hey, neither am I!), but most have been great about it and very understanding. Let's say that my dream of being able to quit my day job to do Epitaphs Magazine has blown away like so much smoke from the neighbors burning leaves. Oh, well. I'll keep doing Epitaphs until I can't do it no more. I'm stubborn like that.

I'm a little distracted right now. Bella is sick with a nasty head cold. She's my priority. And I'm taking off work to take care of her tomorrow, so Daddy's off night duty. Gotta run.

M.

2007-10-18T13:25:00.000-07:00

I blogged too soon

Okay, so I blogged to soon in my excitement (didn't I tell you I was like that?). I thought the mag was really for real ready to go this time, but nope. I'm still trying to get the cover figured out. Argh. Foiled again!

More later ...

-M.

2007-10-18T07:28:00.000-07:00

Epitaphs Magazine #5 is here and fabulous!

Everyone, I am so very flippin' proud to announce that Epitaphs Magazine #5 is ready and waiting for you to buy it! I'm doing the Snoopy dance as we speak!

And not only is it available, it is in COLOR! You can also either buy a print copy or download it in PDF format right on your own little computer. Keep in mind, though, that the file is pretty big and takes a while to download, but it's a lot cheaper.

Since the mag is in color, it's more expensive this time. I'm also working with a new publisher--Lulu.com. They make books, magazines and other publications available. I'm also working on putting out a black and white version of this issue, too, which will cost less. But that one will take a while as I have to reconfigure it to make sure the photos still look great.

For those of you keeping score, you know that this is the first issue I not only edited as usual but also designed. It has a brand new look (a little more journal like) and a new layout. But it still has the same high quality of articles and interesting stuff.

Our last issue was the "spooky" issue, which by the way is selling like crazy this month. I may even sell out soon! This issue is back to the cemeteries without the spooky stuff. There are tons of gorgeous photos (in color!) and great articles, including one on how to adopt a cemetery. The cover story features amazing photographer Jeffrey Netz. You will love his work. His photography was also featured in issue #2, the New Orleans issue.

When you get your copy of the new mag, please drop me a line to let me know what you think. I'm already starting on issue #6. Stories and photos are due in by Dec. 1 to make the submission deadline. So start sending your stuff in! My goal, now that I have full reign on everything, is to get the magazine out more often.

Thank you for your continued support of Epitaphs Magazine, TheCemeteryClub.com, "Cemetery Walk," and me! YOU are the reason I do all this crazy stuff that I do!

Yours in taphophilia,
Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2007-10-11T20:20:00.000-07:00

Farewell, Sweet Nola

This past Sunday our little Nola died. This is the first time I've actually said it, and really I'm just typing it. I've told people we put her to sleep, we put her down (which sounds terrible) or that we lost her. But to say she "died" is so harsh sounding. Of course, it is harsh. Humane, but harsh.

We adopted Nola at the very end of 2005. She was one when we got her at the animal shelter. She had traveled three hours from Fayette, Iowa, under the hood of a truck. She wasn't injured at all; she'd just taken a very long ride in a weird place. Even at the time, it made us tear up to think of what she went through to find us.

We had a pretty good couple of years (almost) with her. She was a fantastic cat. Everyone who knew her thought so. She'd play fetch with a ball up and down the basement stairs. She'd even give the ball to different people each time so everyone could have a turn tossing it down the stairs for her to run after. She was incredibly good natured. She loved to play and be a wacky cat.

Her favorite place in the world was on our screened in front porch. She always wanted out there. Unfortunately over the summer it was too hot most of the time, but we let her out as often as we could. Especially since she was sick for so many months. The doctor didn't know what her ailment was, so we weren't sure how to help her. We did what we could to make her happy and comfortable. It's so hard, though, because most cats don't show pain that much.

This past weekend, though, it was quite obvious she was very, very ill. She could keep nothing down and was barely eating. And she loved to eat. Even when it kept coming up, the poor girl still had her appetite. And no wonder, she was so thin. She must have been hungry all the time. Our once robust girl was skin and bones.

There is much less chaos in our house now. We've gone from three crazy cats to two. One stays mostly in the basement, and the other is back to her old princess self. The Nola chaos had been missing for a while since she was feeling so poorly, but there's a big hole in our hearts and our lives.

I know we did the right thing. We took her to the Animal Emergency Center to some of the most wonderful and caring people in the business. They made her last moments as peaceful as possible. The doctor administered the medication as I held our Nola and Bill and I were petting her. Her last moments were filled with love, as was her life with us. It's an almost physical pain in my chest just to write all of this. I thought we'd have her for a long time. She seemed to strong for so long. But we lost her and we miss her. I miss her.

I want to think that she is somewhere sitting in a window and snacking on some bread (she loved bread and would rip into any package of it if you turned your head away for five seconds). I want to think she had plenty of bouncy balls to toss around whenever she wants. I want to know for sure that she is happy and knows that we love her and miss her and that her mom feels awful about letting her down and not being able to make it all better.

Good night, sweet Nola. You brought us so much joy.

Love,
Your mom

2007-08-15T21:08:00.000-07:00

Since I have three main blogs I post to, I've decided to copy tonight's MySpace blog here to save time (since it is way past my bedtime) ...

I know, I know ... I sound like a broken record. "Man, I wish I knew how this whole MySpace thing works." I feel like an old ninny. Anyway, I need to shut up about it, because whining about not knowing what I'm doing on here is REALLY proving how very OLD I am. I just need to do lunch with Tom the MySpace guy and pick his brain.

Anyway ... I did find a site with some fab info on it: http://www.tamingthebeast.net/myspace/layout-generator-myspace.htm. I'm adding the link to my blog so that I can find it again. I regularly use three different computers, so this is important. I'm all about web-based info.

Hell week #1 is over at work. Now we're in #2. The good thing is that I have Friday off. No baby caregiver that day. So it's me and the babe. That's the good news. The not so good news was that I've had to cram 5 days of work into 4. But it's all good. I was freaking for a couple days, but I'm beyond that now. Thank god. Spazzy me is not a fun me.

Cool news. I've decided on a new book. No, not to read. To write. I've been kind of working on the cemetery postcard book for a while now (and still will be), but my heart hasnt' quite been in it. My new book will resemble "Cemetery Walk" a bit but be focused more on cemetery people.

Here's the title: "Tales of the Taphophiles: Cemeteries and the People Who Love Them."

I thought of it on the way to work. Some story on NPR triggered it, even though it had nothing to do with taphophiles or cemeteries. It feels good. It feels do-able. It feels real. The postcard book will come in time. I'm still collecting the postcards, but I'm not going to rush it.

So now I'm looking for people who love cemeteries and have a story to tell. If you know any, send me an e-mail at minda.epitaphsmag@gmail.com.

2007-07-23T08:36:00.000-07:00

The Future of Epitaphs Magazine

Wow, what a slacker I am! No post on here since early last month? Sheesh.

Well, I'm back and have some updates. First, Epitaphs Magazine is in the process of changing. Though the magazine has a growing following, it just hasn't been enough to pay the bills. In essence, the magazine went bankrupt. Then with the increase in postal rates, printing costs and the loss of our designer, it just about fell into oblivion. But, much like the phoenix, it is starting its rise from the flames.

Epitaphs is being revamped. Originally I thought it would have to go online. Then I was faced with the issue of charging per online issue or for a subscription and how that would work. My website is great, but it does have limitations. And would people really want to pay for an online magazine? It's a hard sell, because people tend to think online stuff should be free. But it didn't change how printing costs and such had gone out of my non-existant budget. And, on top of all this, I still have subscribers with issues left. Being as the magazine was bankrupt, I could not just refund people's money. But I certainly was not going to leave people hanging. What to do?

The good news is that EM is staying alive. And the support of people has been wonderful. More good news is that my husband is going to be designing the new magazine. It will have a new look and feel. While the other one was wonderful, with this new era for the magazine, it's going to be treated as a new piece. So Bill is going to learn the ropes, as it were, and make it happen.

The magazine is also going through a new publisher. It will now be printed through CafePress.com. This will take a great burden off of me, as I have been soley in charge of the printing, storage, mailing and everything for the magazine for two years. With the new version, people will be able to order it directly from CafePress and have it shipped from them. Let me tell you, not having to haul a few hundred magazines around at a time will be wonderful! I spend a lot of my not-so-spare time writing, editing and organizing the magazine, so this burden is doing a welcome disappearing act!

But while the magazine is changing, it's still going to have the same great quality of articles, photos and more. The writers and I are currently pulling together a great issue for the fall. I think you'll be pleased.

So that's the update for now. If you have any questions about anything, please e-mail me at minda.epitaphsmag@gmail.com.

Thanks!
Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2007-06-10T18:59:00.000-07:00

Big surprise. Being a mommy is time-consuming. I'm certainly not complaining, though. When I look into my daughter's eyes and see that smile, I know I've never seen anything more beautiful. Just thinking about her makes all the stuff that I feel I'm not doing enough of seem not to be so bad. (I'm sure I could've written that sentence in a much better way, but I'm too tired and too busy to worry that much about it!)

Today is marks the first time in a long time that I've actually been able to sit down and do some research on a cemetery project. During some of my lunches during the week I've done work on my website and also worked on a couple of interviews, but that's about it. Today I was able to dig up some information for the gravestone rubbing class I have scheduled for next month. I admit I've been frustrated with scheduling this class. It's something I want to do; it will give me an excuse to get back into Chippiannock Cemetery and also meet some more local taphophiles. The reason for the frustration is that it's difficult to schedule a time when people are available. When I asked for dates people were interested in, I received no response, so I scheduled it for July 14. Of the five people who said they wanted to take the class, I've heard from one. And he works there! I'm hoping to hear from others soon. The deadline for registration is June 18, so we'll see.

Why a June 18 deadline for July 14 class? The gravestone rubbing kits. Unfortunately since my business is just me (oh, and the print version of the magazine essentially went bankrupt), I can't afford crazy extravagances such as having a supply of gravestone rubbing kits on hand. I do wish I could. It would be a good thing to have. But with the print mag problems and my husband being out of work for almost three months (but he had a great job now!), it just hasn't been in the cards. It's frustrating to be running a professional site on half a shoestring budget. Hey, maybe I could write a book about that ....

Speaking of books, I just finished a query letter for a new book idea. There's a publishing company I've been very interested in working with for years, and I finally have a proposal idea for them that fits what they do. Yes, it has to do with cemeteries. I'm pretty excited about it and am hoping for the best. I think it's got a good shot in getting their attention. It's called "Naked Cemeteries." Just kidding!

***

My friend Tim's favorite words of wisdom for me for years have been, "Just you wait." He said this when I told him I was engaged six years ago (my five-year wedding anniversary is this coming Friday), and he's said it to me repeatedly since I first told him Bill and I were having a baby.

Conversations went something like this:

"Tim, I can't believe how crazy things are. It's so hard trying to get ready for the baby."

"Just you wait. This is nothing."

"Tim, how am I going to do it all? I can't get it all done now!"

"Just you wait."

"Tim, I don't have any time to do anything."

"Just you wait. All the things you keep doing to make other people happy are going to go away. When that baby gets here, your focus will be baby, baby, baby. Because it's got to be. You stop worrying so much about the other things. The baby is your priority, and nothing else seems as big anymore."

He was so right. If the print version of the magazine would have fallen through before the baby, I would have freaked out and done everything I possibly could have to save it. Instead, I have accepted that it had to evolve to keep going. I'm still not happy that I still owe a number of subscribers issues, but I'm getting it all figured out as I'm going along. People have been VERY understanding and supportive about the change from print to online. I would have had a much rougher time with this if it hadn't been for people's support in e-mails and actions. One of my subscribers even told me not to worry about finishing the subscription and to consider it a donation. That was incredibly generous and made my month.

In bits and pieces I've been working on getting the website ready with its new look and launch of the new online version of Epitaphs Magazine. I've also been getting more requests for interviews regarding cemeteries and related topics. And I'm interviewing people as often as I can.

Upcoming interviews for Epitaphs Magazine Online will include:
- photographer Jeffrey Netz
- celebrant Pam Vetter
- photographer John T. Clark

I'm also setting up interviews with some cemetery preservationists. If you have any ideas for interviews or articles, I'd love to hear them. E-mail me at minda.epitaphsmag@gmail.com.

Well, it's time for me to move on to reading one of the three books I've got going right now. Will it be "Forgotten Faces" (the one book I know of on memorial photo-ceramics), "Your Guide to Cemetery Research" (my bible of cemetery info by Sharon Carmack) or "Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince" (I'm re-reading it in preparation for the last book, which is out next month!). I tell you, it's sure hard to read with a grabby baby in your arms who wants to play with the pages. And these pages are much more tearable than her board and cloth books!

Before I do that, I've got to figure out my Vonage account info. We're switching (after one month) to Mediacom, as they are offering free service for the rest of the year. So far Vonage has been fine, but free is free. Wish me luck!

2007-02-14T09:57:00.000-08:00

Now What?

Okay, so I've written THE book I was supposed to write. And I got it published and all that good stuff. I was planning on writing a book about New Orleans cemeteries before I got pregnant. Well, that would have included lots of traveling to said city, and that didn't happen. Plus, there are actually a lot of books on NOLA cemeteries. Mine was going to focus on post-Katrina things, though. Anyway, at this time that book is a no-go.

Now that the baby is five months old, I feel like I can allow some focus on other things as well as Bella. And now I'm itching to start another project. While still doing the magazine. You'd think that would be enough, but I've got a bunch of books in me. But now what?

I've had some ideas:

- Pet Cemeteries - a new trend on the rise, plus reflecting on the old ones
- Cemetery postcards - I love them!
- What's a Cemetery? - a children's book
- Focus on a single cemetery - not sure which one yet, possibly local

If anyone has any thoughts on this, I'd love to hear them.

I'm also looking into expanding my online store to offer genealogy and scrapbooking items (for cemetery and genealogy related scrapbooking). I'd like feedback on whether people would be interested or not.

Happy Valentine's Day!
Minda

thecemeteryclub.com

2007-01-31T12:41:00.000-08:00

Awesome article from The Onion, the country's best fake news source

Ah, the bittersweet genius of parody writing. It makes me laugh AND shed a silent tear. I adore New Orleans and lament its state, but at least I still have a sense of humor about it. You have to given what happened and what continues to happen--or not happen.

"FEMA Calls Rebuilding Complete as New Orleans Restored to Former Squallor"

"We've done our best to ensure the city is as well off as it was before Katrina hit," Blanco said. "It's all back—the same abandoned cars, the broken bottles, the spent shotgun shells, the rat colonies, even the used diapers on the front lawns. People of New Orleans, welcome home."

One of my favorite parts is the cutline that goes with this photo: "Crews reconstructed post–Mardi Gras filth and hosed down Bourbon Street with donated urine."

2007-01-31T08:01:00.000-08:00

How to Eulogize Someone You Don't Like

Interesting response to a woman who wants to know how to publicly remember a real jerk. From Salon.com.

How to eulogize the dad no one likes?

2007-01-30T08:55:00.000-08:00

Where the Heck Have I Been?

I've been being a mommy! I've also focused more blog time on my mommy blog The Accidental Mom. I've also been working on issue #4 of Epitaphs Magazine--which is now close to being done!!!! I am soooo excited about this, as we are pretty late on it due to babies, new jobs, etc. It's a great issue, though, and well worth the wait. I'm also working on issue #5 and preparing for a cemetery art class I'm teaching each Sunday in February for CommUniversity.

I have some cemetery stuff for you folks right now, though. God bless YouTube.com!

GreenSprings Eco-Cemetery

Highgate Cemetery then and Now

an artsy video with music of cemetery at St. John's Church, Hampstead, London

55 seconds in a cemetery in Codogno, Italy

photo slideshow of Graniteville Cemetery

If you see any good cemetery videos on YouTube.com, let me know so I can share them. Or e-mail them to the Yahoo Group interview_taphophile.

Cheers!
Minda

TheCemeteryClub.com

2006-09-29T10:21:00.000-07:00

Annabella is here! She came nearly 3 weeks early. She was born Friday, Sept. 22, 2006. 5 lbs 8 oz, 17.5 inches long. She is just beautiful! And teeny tiny!

The last time I posted on here was one day before she was born. She was still in my tummy. I went into early labor at 1:30 a.m. Friday. She was born at 8:16 p.m. that night. It was around 2:30 p.m. when things really started happening. I had an OB appointment scheduled at 11:15 a.m. that day, and we kept that. I was dilated 1 cm at the time. I didn't know if I was in for a LONG weekend or what. We went to Arthur's Garden Deli for lunch. Got lots of stares when contractions hit. Then we went to Target to get the other car seat for my parents (we wanted to get another base only, but they didn't carry our brand--so for $10 more, we got a base and seat). Contractions started getting more major. The nice lady at the Starbucks counter gave us water. When we started walking around again, we headed to the Bootique--the Halloween section and my favorite. I was not enjoying it much, though. We ran into our friend Tracey T. there. I remember talking to her but not about exactly what.

The OB had said to call in once my contractions were under 5 minutes apart for more than an hour. They certainly were at Target. She said to head over to the hospital. See, it works out that my OB, general practitioner, the hospital and Target are all in the same area. The OB is right across from the hospital, and Target is in the strip mall to the left of the OB. How handy! We wanted to stay close.

When they checked me at the hospital, I was dilated to 4 cm. They admitted me. It was at this point I told them I wanted drugs. Actually, by the time we were at Target, I was convinced I wanted them. All my plans of having a totally natural birth went out the window, and I was more than willing to push them out.

By 6:30 p.m. I had had my "take the edge off" drugs (one dose at about 4:30 p.m.). When they tell you it takes the pain away but you still feel the contractions, they mean it takes a little pain away, you feel the contractions and every other one kicks your ass. Ouch! At 6:30 to 6:45 p.m., the doctor on call for me (Dr. Pagadala) broke my water. Whooosh! Right as she was saying, "Now that your water has released, the contractions are going to have more bite to them," I felt like a shark had a hold of me. "Oh, my god! You weren't kidding!" Or something along those lines. Soon after, the nurse had me get on the birthing ball. I was to rock back and forth sideways, which would help get baby into position. It sounds easier than it is. For those who haven't gone through the birth experience, imagine trying to sit or rest comfortably with someone's head coming down your birth canal. It's not comfy to say the least. Bill, my husband, was sitting behind me putting pressure on my low back, which helped me a lot. He was trying to get me to rock and at one point I said in a near-Exorcist voice, "I DON'T WANT TO." And he said okay and backed off for a few minutes. Aside from little things like that, I never blamed him for my pain or anything. I was in the zone women talk about.

Here's the deal about the zone. It almost feels like an out-of-body experience, but the thing is that you aren't out of your body--you're deep inside it. It's like you're there experiencing the pain and near delusional, and the rest of you is focusing on your body and your body only. That's the primal part. You don't care what bodily functions happen as you're pushing, that you're pouring with sweat, that your body is moving in weird ways (my one hand was reaching out and waving around most of the time, like I was trying to conduct the pain away).

After being on the birthing ball for a little while, I told my mom or whomever was listening (by the way, my husband, mother and father were with me the whole time) that I was pushing. "I don't know if I should but I am." So Mom got the nurse who said to stop. She got me on the bed again to check my dilation, and she said, "Oh! Yes, it is time for you to push! I'll get the doctor." So I had progressed fast once the waters broke and the ball rocked the baby into place. Since early on, I had effaced nicely, so it was all a matter of the cervix opening up. That water was holding me and baby back. We were ready.

Birth was not what I expected. It didn't matter how many books I read, websites I looked up or subscribed to or people I talked to. It really did not prepare me. Of course, she did come early. Still. I thought you would push push push until the baby came out. I had read/heard that you get to rest between contractions (because that's when you push), but it didn't register with me at the time. I kept feeling like if I didn't keep bearing down, she might slide back in, and I'd have to start over again! So I wanted to clench to hold her in place.

Then Bill and my mom started saying they could see her head. Dad was at my head placing cool wash cloths on my forehead (and in my eyes!). He also held my head down to push my chin to my chest, which I just couldn't do. Mom and Bill held my legs for me. I gripped onto the handle bars on either side of me to bear down like nothing else. I could hardly move them a couple of days later. But when they kept talking about her head, I was sure it would be over soon. To them it was, to me the pushing session were never-ending. Then once her head came out, I thought she'd come on through ... and the doctor said, "One more push." Aaahhhhh! But I did it. Just when I didn't think I could do anymore. And I'd been thinking that since mid major pushing.

At 8:16 p.m., the most beautiful baby I have ever seen was born. She is incredible. She is worth all the pain and more.

I didn't even have an epidural, which earlier that day I was thinking would be a very nice option. So aside from one dose of pain meds, we had a natural birth. It was an amazing experience, and I am so blessed to have shared it with the support team of my husband, mother and father. Before hand I thought it might be weird to have my dad there, that he would be uncomfortable and maybe I would. But no. It was more than natural to have them there. It has bonded us all so much closer together, and we were close to begin with. As my husband said, "I can't imagine it any other way.

That's Annabella Clementine Powers-Douglas' birth story. Today she is one week old. We had some feeding/weight loss issues earlier this week, but we've figured it all out with the help of visiting nurse Salli and Kathy the lactation consultant. And the Medela breast pump. I've been dealing with some chills, fever and earache. Funny, I don't remember my ears' involvement in the birth process.

I'm just now getting *a little* caught up on e-mail stuff. It's not been my priority, really. :-) But other people have sent me payments for items and magazines, so I've got to take care of it sometime soon.

Here are some pictures of our angel.

In love with my little girl,
Minda

2006-09-21T12:54:00.000-07:00

How Madonna Ruined My Night

I'm telling you, that Madonna can ruin a perfectly good evening. I had a dream last night where I was hanging out with a bunch of people, friends and such, and Tom Cruise, Katie Holmes and their baby stop by. In the dream, Tom and I are old pals. And as I give him a hug hello and coo over the baby, I'm thinking, "You know, I've known Tom a long time. So he's gotten a little kooky acting. He's still my friend." And we go on to have a lovely evening reminiscing and catching up.

Then the whole group of us decide to go out for dinner. It's Thanksgiving and dark out and rainy. We decide to go to Shogun, this sushi/hibatchi grill that's not to far away. Only in the dream it's a totally different place. It's supposed to be open, but it looks closed. Fortunately, we're in good with the owners and they insist we come in--all 20 or so of us. So we all start piling out of our cars, and who pulls up in some crappy old green beater of a car but Madonna (and, I think, Lindsay Lohann). She not only is uninvited but also pulls right up to the door and PARKS her car in front of it sideways! And I'm thinking, "What a cow!" Then I'm all, "Madonna, what are you doing? You can't park there. It's raining, some of us are pregnant and it's totaly illegal!" She just gives me this "I don't care, you peon" look and walks inside. And then I'm all, "Who invited Madonna anyway?" No one fesses up.

Aside from the cow, it's a lovely time. Great food. I remember picturing lots of red and black lacquer in the decor. The real Shogun is all blond wood and white. Totally different.

And now for something completely different ...

Baby update:

We are officially 20 days until d-day. Less than three weeks, friends! Holy cow! (and I don't mean Madonna) She's dropped a little but not a lot yet. Bill and I are still getting the house ready. The nursery is still crazy with stuff. After three showers, it's a bit full. I'm not complaining, though! We have just about everything we need or want for the upcoming arrival. I'm currently on the prowl for nursing undergarments and shirts that a) fit and b) don't cost an arm and leg. Apparently the nursing garment industry thinks that the only women who get pregnant are between a size 6 and 10. If you're a curvy gal like me or little and tiny, you're screwed.

One thing I didn't realize until I was a million months pregnant was that because all your internal organs get pushed up, it expands your ribs. I'm broad-chested anyway, and now my bra extenders need bra extenders. It is so lame. And if I'm lucky enough to find a bra that fits around my ever-expanding chest, it is assumed that my cup size is equally enormous. Not the case. Well, not yet anyway. If I could fill in a DDDD size cup, I doubt I could walk upright.

I went shopping at a place called Vintage Baby yesterday. It's a consignment store. There is one close to my work and one close to my home. I found a nursing top, which is in my size and I hope fits. It's really hard to tell if something will fit you post-baby when you have said baby still bulging in your belly. So for $6.99, I thought what the heck. I can always consign it back. They carry baby and kids clothes and stuff as well as maternity and every once in a while nursing clothes. Of course I also saw the cutest Christmas dress in red velvetine that should fit the baby for the holidays. I couldn't resist. I'm telling you, baby clothes are made by evil people passing as innocents. They make all these adorable outfits that a baby will maybe be able to wear two times then grow out of. And most are generally not that pricey (some are, though), so you think it's fine. But it's not. And suddenly you have a closet FILLED with tiny adorable outfits! They multiply like rabbits on speed! And if you're a first-time parent, you get twice as suckered in. And you don't know exactly what sizes to buy. Buy them big, but how big? I'm telling you, it's a huge plot. And my husband and I keep falling for it. Bill bought the baby two Halloween caps (little ghosties), a pair of boo socks and a boo onesie in less than an hour at two different stores. That's on top of the Halloween cap I bought the day before that looks like a witch hat. Weeks before, we couldn't resist a "Baby's first boo" onesie and "I love my mummy" bib. And during shower number two we got another Halloween onesie and bib from a friend who knows how much I love Halloween. It's a coup.

In cemetery-related news:

Epitaphs Magazine is plugging along. I'm editing right now and starting layout stuff. The plan is to get it to designer Kristie within a week.

One thing I need to do is pack my camera along with me wherever I go. I keep seeing cool cemeteries I haven't been to but have no camera to capture the moments. What kind of taphophile am I anyway?

In other news:

I'm getting back into the jewelry-making swing. Actually I'm currently focusing on making beaded bookmarks (or book thongs like you see in mall bookstores). If you are in the market, And the Bead Goes On (my friend Tracey's super-cool business), sells them for $3 each (instead of $6.95 everywhere else!!!). Great for Christmas and birthdays! I can hook you up! I can also hook you up with beautiful and affordable jewelry if you are in the market. You can see examples of what we make in issue #3 of Epitaphs Magazine (ad is on the inside back cover).

I'm shamelessly promoting this stuff because a) it's great stuff and b) because it's how I'm earning baby savings. I'm doing what I can to save up money for when my paid maternity leave ends. I'd really like to be able to be off through most of December (if the baby is born on time or late). If she's early, I want to be able to have at least a week's salary to get me paid through the Thanksgiving break without having to come back. It's all up to baby when I get off. That's the great unknown, not knowing exactly how to plan for this. I'm working all the way up until I have her.

Well, that's the scoop. My mom is coming over to talk baby stuff and go over the house with me to see what we can get done. I still have baby brain. Words fail me when I'm talking sometimes. At least when I'm typing things move a little smoother. For a few weeks there, it was a wonder that I was able to string two sentences together. I don't know how I did the work projects I did. Perhaps I was on marketing auto pilot.

Have a great weekend, everybody! Fall is here! At least in the western Illinois region, and I'm loving it. It's my fave time of year. Love it!

Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2006-08-28T13:24:00.000-07:00

Hurricane Katrina: A Year Already?

How can it be? One year ago today the hurricane hit the Gulf Coast and changed our country. After 9/11, we watched a country come together in horror, patriotism, sadness and anger. When Katrina hit (soon to be followed by Hurricane Rita), we were in disbelief at the devastation and then at the lack of action by FEMA. But what we did see were thousands of people--mere citizens--giving of themselves and doing what they could to help their Southern neighbors. Some opened their homes to extended family members, friends or even strangers. Donations poured in, trucks were driven down ... all while the government stood around wondering what to do. I know I will never forget the people I saw on TV as they stood on their rooftops, waiting and waiting in 100-degree weather to be rescued from the flooding. And how was it that the government said they couldn't get through to help people, but the media was all over the place?

In December, I visited New Orleans because I had to. My family didn't want me to go; my husband didn't either, but he knew I had to. I talked to people about their city, their losses and their hopes and fears for the future. I helped with some cemetery clean-up work. I met more people whose goodness and love for the city outshined the devastation I saw. I heard the anger in some residents' voices as they questioned why folks were running around with cameras like it was a tourist attraction when they were still being told that they wouldn't have electricity for weeks or months.

The first time I visited New Orleans in 2003, I fell in love with the city. I felt the seduction of the sounds and smells and feel of it. It changed me with its romance and made me a romantic. When I came back after Katrina in 2005, it changed me again. I saw devastation and war zones--where nature took out its aggression on houses and trees and anything else in its path. But most importantly I saw determination in people's eyes who had lost so much. Not only were they intent on surviving and bringing their beloved home back, they were determined that the good times they've been so well known for would continue. While they may not have had much left, they would certainly find what they needed to make you one hell of a meal because you are their guest and that's one of the many things they are known for. Southern hospitality even in the wake of two hurricanes.

Those of you who know me know how much I love this city. I have great admiration for the city and her people. It's not just the amazing cemeteries, the oyster po' boys, the music, ghost tours, beignets and cafe au laits (which are more than enough on any given day to get me going!), it's the people. It's the history. The attitude. The everything. No matter what you know about New Orleans, it's always going to surprise you somehow.

Today I received an e-mail from MoveOn.org, a great progressive movement site that is all about what is right and just. I've been on their mailing list for a few years now. Today they sent out an e-mail promoting a new book produced by the ACORN group, which is working to protect evacuees' rights and rebuild New Orleans right. The book is called "It Takes A Nation: How Strangers Became Family." According to the e-mail, the book features "amazing and moving first-person interviews with Katrina evacuees and the donors who took them in, and evocative photos of the folks involved and the aftermath of the flood." Illinois Senator Barack Obama wrote the forward. If you buy it through them for $20 (it retails for $25), ALL of the proceeds will go directly to ACORN. Not a bad deal. Of course, I'm ordering a copy today.

More information on MoveOn.org and "It Takes A Nation: How Strangers Became Family."

I also sent ACORN an offer for free advertising space to promote their program to help the families of New Orleans. They are doing some fine work, and I'd like to help continue that.

I'd also like your opinions. They have a "Spread the Word" area on their site with things you can do to help out. One of which is "Adopt a House" in New Orleans. What you do is have a fundraiser, bake sale, etc., to raise money to donate to them. For $2,500, a group can "Adopt a House." That is how much it costs to gut a single house--covering the cost of tools and protective gear used by volunteers and displaced residents, permits, and insurance. More than 300 volunteers a month come to New Orleans to help rebuild (volunteers, not paid people). ACORN is currently able to gut five homes a day. That is amazing.

While I am way pregnant and won't be able to go to New Orleans for quite a while, I still want to help out. This is where you come in. What do you think about having a "virtual bake sale"? For a donation, a person can purchase a "virtual baked good" (ex. a "cookie" for $5, "brownie" for $10, "piece of pie" for $15, etc.). The person would receive a graphic of the virtual baked good for his or her site, e-mail, etc., and all the money would go to "Adopt a House."

That is my proposal and I would love to hear what people think about it. Would anyone be interested in such a fundraiser?

You can send me a response to this post, or e-mail me directly at poetrychick_99@yahoo.com. You know how much I love to hear from people!

Thanks for reading!

Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2006-08-24T14:20:00.000-07:00

Forget the niceties ...

This is what I ended up sending to the evil jackass of ebay:

After 500 transactions on ebay, this is the worst transaction I've
ever been through. You didn't even send the packages until 4
days after I paid you and sent them media mail, which takes
longer--and then use the 7 days after payment limitation as an
excuse. I didn't receive the second box until Aug. 21!
And it still wasn't complete. Mistakes happen, and I accept that,
but don't stand by stipulations that are null and void when you
set the situation up where I wouldn't receive the item for 3
weeks.

I still want the missing table top sent, which I hope to receive
before my baby arrives. You have no idea the stress you're
putting me through as an 8-months-pregnant woman. You sent
a different item than the one you listed, which is fraudulent. You
did not sell as seen. You switched items. The proof is in your
listing photos and in the photos I have taken of the table.

Send the table top.

This is what he replied back:

was shipped parcel post. i dont care how pregnant you are stress is no answer. sold as is. no refund.

I don’t know if this means he actually shipped the table top or is talking about what he shipped before, which was media mail. I hope it has been shipped. He probably crapped on it first. And on top of being an ass, he can’t spell or even offer a solid retort. I am a far superior person in intellect and probably in taste and style. His mother was a hamster, his father stank of elderberries, and I fart in his general direction. And I think he has fleas. Once we receive the table top and I leave SCATHING negative feedback, I am done with “mister” jaredb88989.

Bill and I are going to purchase a replacement chair cushion from Babee Tenda. Hopefully we won't have to buy a table top, too. So much for a decent deal on this table. Perhaps we can have a ceremonial burial of the cushion. Grave of the Unknown Babee Tenda cushion.

If any of you know a Jared in Rhode Island who thinks he's awesome, slap a "kick me" sign on his back. And then slap him again.

I feel much better now after my rants. My husband can stop worrying about me.

2006-08-23T20:05:00.000-07:00

I used to love ebay. Now I'm not so sure. Bill and I paid a big chunk of money for a Babee Tenda table. It took 21 days to receive it (the guy sent it media mail...it's a table!), and it's not only stained and mildewed, it's also not even the right table!!! It's a different one than the photos showed on the listing! And the seller is saying that I didn't contact him before the 7 days after the listing ended to complain. He didn't mail it until after that! We paid $230 with shipping on this item (which goes new for $550). He said it was "almost new" and in "good condition." Now he's saying too bad. If you are in the market for a Babee Tenda table, please let me know so I can tell you this jerk's ID. I wanted to post it here for people to see and avoid (or lynch), but that would be nasty. And even though I am 8 months pregnant and have dealt with some recent illness and health scares and am QUITE emotional, I won't stoop so low.

What a total jackass, taking advantage of a couple having their first baby and not exactly having money to spare. So much for my continued love affair with ebay.

Time for me to move on and stop being stressed. Otherwise Bill is going to get a tranquilizer gun and get me!

Minda

2006-08-10T08:07:00.000-07:00

Attention: Taphophiles! This is an event you don't want to miss!

Thursday October 19, 2006 - Saturday October 21, 2006
Death & Loss in America: Colonial Era to the Present; Museum of Funeral Customs Symposium
Springfield, Illinois

The Museum of Funeral Customs will host “Death & Loss in America: Colonial Era to the Present,” a special symposium addressing scholarly research in the subjects of death, funeral customs, interment, grief, and mourning in North America from the Colonial Period to the present. Held at Springfield’s Crowne Plaza Hotel, October 19-21, 2006, the conference brings together representatives from a broad spectrum of disciplines, including funeral service professionals, museum professionals, academic historians, sociologists, psychologists, archaeologists, anthropologists, cemeterians, theologians, and graduate students, to examine the subject broadly, share current research, discuss common interests, promote networking, and disseminate material.

The Symposium includes several concurrent sessions of paper presentations over the three-day format, an Open House Reception at the Museum of Funeral Customs on Thursday evening, and a Friday evening banquet with independent author Christine Quigley delivering the keynote address, “The Body as Memento Mori.” Additionally, licensed Illinois funeral directors can earn up to 13 hours of continuing education credits towards their license renewal throughout the Symposium. The registration fee for attending all three days is $100 if registering by October 1st ($150 if after the early-bird deadline), individual day registration is at $50 per day ($75 per day after October 1), and $30 ($55 after October 1) for a student registration with a copy of a valid student ID. The banquet is $30. Inquiries about the Symposium and registration can be made by phone at 217-544-3480, or by e-mail at funeralmuseum@ifda.org.

******

Unfortunately, I WILL be missing this event, but I want to hear all about it when it's over! My excuse? Well, since all I've been writing about lately has been my baby, you can probably figure that out. Annabella is due Oct. 11, so ... And I think I shared that I originally had a paper proposal for the symposium accepted. Oh, well. There's always next year! I do encourage all of you who can to go, as it's going to be a great event. If you haven't been to the museum yet, it's a real treat. Very well done. And if you do go, I'm going to of course want someone to cover it for Epitaphs Magazine! If anyone wants to do a write-up, let me know! poetrychick_99@yahoo.com

*******

As far as cemeteries go, I haven't been out to visit any for a long while. I did teach a class on gravestone rubbing last month, though, and that was pretty cool. It's exciting to meet new taphophiles, especially ones really into their family genealogy and cemetery preservation. The recent heatwave has kept me inside as of late, so I haven't been out and about among the graves much this summer. I feel like I have a little bit, though, due to the images people have been sending for the website and magazine.

Speaking of which, I'm in the process of updating the Featured Photos section of TheCemeteryClub.com. It was taking too long to load, so now I'm transitioning to thumbnails. I've been swamped with major events at and for my day job, so my time has been limited. Summer is a huge season for the college. Weird, huh?

Bill and I also started our childbirth/lamaze class this week. I didn't realize it was lamaze when we signed up, which is no problem. I just didn't know. I am focusing on hypnobirthing. I'm doing a home study class to prepare for the birth. Both techniques are all about relaxation and reducing fear and anxiety, so it's all good. Maybe when it cools down I can practice hypnobirth in one of my favorite cemeteries. That always relaxes me! (Don't worry, I don't plan on having the baby in the cemetery. My husband would freak out at even the mention of it!)

Minda

2006-08-04T10:29:00.000-07:00

More pics! From the zoo.

Of course as I've typed this and added the pics, they are all in a different order than what I've written here. But I'm not going to let my OCD behavior make me change it, because I have faith that all of you will know what's what. :-)

These pics are from Father's Day when Bill and I went with my mom and dad to Niabi Zoo. There is even a cemetery-related photo in here! It's a memorial to Kathy Sha-boom, the elephant and long-time mascot of the zoo.

Pictured here are my dad and Bill showing off their wingspans. Then there's Bill with an emu. Bill also had a good time feeding the fish and the ducks. And, of course, there are the monkey face pictures. A must at any zoo.

That's my mom hanging out with the hippo. And there's our new monkey friend.

2006-08-04T10:23:00.000-07:00

Now it's finally time for pregnant Minda photos!

First is Minda and baby checking out baby's wingspan at Niabi Zoo. This was right outside the Bald Eagle area. So far, the baby doesn't have a huge wingspan. Thank goodness.

Then we have Minda's eye view. This is what I see when I look down at my belly.

And this is my baby belly in profile.

2006-08-02T17:26:00.000-07:00

The Sighing Man

I can hear him in the basement through the vent in the living room. I've never seen him, but I know he's there.

He lives in the furnace. Perhaps "live" isn't the right word. At night when the central air conditioning turns off (which it currently doesn't due to the heat wave), I hear him sigh. I imagine he's used to the heat of the furnace. Just weeks ago we had the unit checked because the air wasn't working properly (it's still struggling with the extreme temperatures). After it was fixed, I started hearing the man. He doesn't speak; he only sighs or makes other breathing noises. His movements rattle the insides of the furnace. He's definitely in the furnace and not the A/C unit, because that is located outside, and I hear him very close to me. The vent is only a few feet away from my favorite chair.

I don't know how he got there, how long he's been there, or who he is. He could be Howard Lane, the elderly man who lived in our house with his wife before his death many years ago. We still receive an occasional piece of his mail. Why he's chosen to spend his afterlife in our furnace (we had it newly installed when we moved in) is beyond me.

When we first moved into the little yellow bungalow five years ago, it was immaculate. The Lanes kept a tidy house. Off-white walls with off-white wall-to-wal carpeting connecting the living room, dining room and the two bedrooms. There were plastic coverings on the living room furniture, though it looked as if no one was allowed to sit on it or possibly even breathe on it. According to the realtor, a neighbor lady who assisted Mrs. Lane after Mr. Lane's passing said the elderly lady spent almost all of her time in the kitchen.

The day the realtor showed us the house, my husband and I looked at each other and knew instinctively that between the two of us and our two cats (which have since become three) that the house's pristineness stood no chance. By this time we had already decided that we wanted the house. We knew within the first five minutes of being inside. We were going to buy the house, ghosts and all. Of course at the time we didn't know there would be ghosts.

I say "ghosts" because there is more than just the man in the furnace. The other ghost is smaller, if it's possible to measure a ghost. I've encountered it off and on since the first month we moved in. I've felt it move past me and have barely seen it out of the corner of my eye. At first I assumed it was one of our cats speeding around, but then I would find them in another room sleeping. I couldn't imagine what it could be since there was no way the Lanes had had a pet. The house was too immaculate for pets. At least that's what I thought until I inspected the basement more closely.

While going through the left-over artifacts in the basement, I came across a nearly full bottle of dog shampoo. I thought it couldn't really belong there and that someone else had left it at the house. It really didn't make much sense, but it's what I figured. Upon asking a neighborhood boy, though, he told me that, yes, the Lanes did have a dog. A small one. Apparently the dog was as much of a neat freak as its owners. He probably sat in the kitchen--and only in the kitchen--with Mrs. Lane and wiped his paws anytime he came in from outside.

The dog still appears from time to time. Usually when I am standing in front of the sink in the bathroom. Our cats often take turns rubbing against my legs while I'm in there (they actually get quite upset if I--heaven forbid--shut the door without allowing them to join me), but there are times when no cat is around. I have a distinct feeling that the dog was a he. While I have no idea what type of dog he was--aside from small--I picture him as a small terrier. Like Benji. That's only because that is the type of dog that was pictured on the shampoo bottle I found.

My husband isn't quite sure what to think about all this. I asked him if he ever heard the man in the furnace the other night. Instead of giving me "the look" (that says "what weirdness are you spouting now?"), he flippantly said that it could be Mr. Lane. But I could tell he didn't really believe it. He's open-minded, but he's kind of a "show-me state" kind of guy. Perhaps he'll hear the man in the furnace the next time it's cool enough for the air to shut off.

Until then I go about my usual days of watching TV, making jewelry, reading, writing occasionally, telling the cats to knock off whatever antics they are doing, and any number of other things I do at home. I say hi to the dog when I sense him and move along. There are no threatening feelings here. We can all co-exist in peace.

Right now I hope for a break in the heat so that the air can take a well-deserved break and Mr. Lane can breathe easy again.

MPD
7/25/06 - 8/2/06

2006-08-01T18:35:00.000-07:00

I feel the need to post more often. At least I have lately. For a while I posted here and there, off and on. Now the more my brain is filled with so much stuff that it's spilling out, I suppose this is as good a way as any to help filter it.

I spent nearly a half an hour at the post office today after work. Since I left late, I knew I was cutting it close and that I was probably going to really annoy some postal workers. I had 55 magazines to ship out. I had stayed up until 11 p.m. last night stuffing them into envelopes and labeling them and knew many people were eagerly awaiting the new issue. Considering our subscribers, keeping the desk people at the PO 10 minutes late isn't a HUGE issue. But to them it may have been. I hope it wasn't too much of a bother. They were pretty kind about it. So that they might be less annoyed with me, I waddled more exaggeratedly out the door and held my belly. Sympathy for the pregnant lady overrides annoyance? I waddle anyway, so it's not like I was totally making it up.

So the magazines are on their way. They are also on the way to the three people who purchased issues since yesterday. And I'll be sending an invoice momentarily to a shop on the East Coast who's been carrying the mag for a little while, Teardrop Memories, which you will learn about if you read the new issue.

If you're reading this post anytime around the time I post it, you are probably sweltering. Our central air is fighting the good fight but just doesn't have the oomph it used to. Freon was added not that long ago (pretty sure I spelled "freon" way wrong), but this heat is just too much for it. Last night I only slept a few hours and am hoping to make up for it tonight. I've been sleeping snuggled up to an ice pack the last few nights. Trying to cool the pulse points. Last night I tried to cool ALL points. Just didn't work. If I had 21 ice packs then maybe.

Lately I've been a little scatter-brained. The heat isn't helping. Too bad global warming "doesn't exist" (according to some politicians); I'd blame that. Yes, I'm ticked at the human race. We've been energy and consumer crazy for centuries and have decided that we don't need to take responsibility for our actions. Since the Industrial Revolution, we've been on a downhill slide in many ways. Don't get me wrong, I am THRILLED with the invention of air conditioning, cars, the Internet and such. Technology is groovy. But, as Spider-Man's uncle says, "With great power comes great responsibility." Humans have been so busy for hundreds of years wondering "can we do this?" and not asking "should we?"

Ah, but I could go on and on. And I'm sitting here in air conditioning while there are folks with none. How sad to hear on the news, "check on elderly neighbors during these heat advisories" as they might be sick or dead.

Other things I could go on and on about are the futile wars overseas. When in history have there not been wars over religion and hatred? Especially in the Middle East. And what makes ANYONE in America think that we, whom many countries hate for our egos and excess and debauchery, can bring democrazy to an area of the world that doesn't really want it?

I recently read a paper a friend of mine wrote about Hitler for a class she is taking. She was actually doing a comparison between Hitler and Martin Luther King Jr. The similarities were in how they both were able to reach massive audiences and sway them with their words and personality. I'm not doing her paper justice, but it's not as way out of a comparison as you might be thinking. Both King and Hitler were charismatic leaders. Both have made impacts on history--though on opposite ends of the spectrum.

Today I read an article on Salon.com about Mel Gibson's drunken, anti-Semitic tirade. The entire article, which I highly recommend, can be read here: "Mel on the Cross" by Neal Gabler. The article doesn't just talk about Mel's disorderly conduct and horrible rant of hatred; it talks about we Americans say we don't condone hate, but our actions show that we really don't condone is outward, blatant signs of hate. Hate and intolerance are still rampant.

Gabler writes:

"Sexual peccadilloes and frat boy stunts are forgivable. Hate is not. No matter how many people may harbor the same sentiments as Gibson, hate speech has typically been condemned, and no matter how often hate raises its ugly head, it has usually been beaten back by the forces of relative enlightenment in journalism and the federal government if only because it fails to comport with how most Americans want to see themselves.

"Thus when the Ku Klux Klan was revived after World War I, it met general opprobrium even as it professed to be carrying the cudgels for morality and even as it was taking over several jurisdictions, including the state of Oregon. Thus when the popular and populist radio priest of the 1930s, the Rev. Charles Coughlin, began spewing anti-Semitic bile, he was quickly quarantined by the Roosevelt administration, which pressured the church into removing Coughlin from the airwaves after having successfully pressured radio networks into dropping his national broadcasts.

"Thus even as racism was the prevailing order of the South, blatant racists like Sen. Theodore Bilbo of Mississippi were excoriated in the national press and ostracized by polite society. ... Call it hypocrisy, but it was hypocrisy that underscored just how uncomfortable Americans were with overt, publicly declaimed hate.

"Or so it was. Mel Gibson, however, does not operate within that elevated environment, because America itself has changed -- one might even say has been radicalized -- since the election of George Bush. The merger of evangelical Christianity, which has long had a tinge of racism and anti-Semitism, with right-wing Republicanism has had many effects on American culture and politics, but perhaps the foremost among them is that it has legitimized attitudes that were previously considered illegitimate by the custodians of the social order."

That was a longer excerpt than I intended at first to include, but I think it tells the story. An eye-opening one at that. Gibson's tirade was shocking and embarassing. As my friend Tim says, "Just because a person is rich and famous doesn't mean he's happy. I'll take my life over it any day--debt and all--because I have my family and we're happy."

My husband, Bill, told me a few days ago that he's worried that I get too upset over things I can't control. That it's not good for me or the baby. You know, things like work issues, politics, things in the news. I see it as a natural response. My theory of the world is this: "Common sense is not common." I'm sure there are tons of people (majority ruling, I'd bet) who go to work and think, "Well, we could do it this way, but that would make sense. We'll most likely do it the hard way." Just try not to get frustrated in those instances. And as unorderly as I am (I'm a messy pack rat), there are certain things that I am a perfectionist about. My writing is one of them. The magazine and website, etc. When it comes to those, typos bother me. Mistakes tick me off. But the thing that really gets me, in whatever situation (work, family, etc.), is lack of communication. I do my best to communicate the things people need to know. Lately I've been annoying myself because some things have fallen aside due to pregnancy issues. It bugs me. When I'm responsible for something and I either make a mistake or slack on something, it really bothers me. I've been called on things before. I could make up a ton of excuses, but lately I've just been fessing up to those things I need to with the hope that people understand that I'm only human. And humans are freaks and we make mistakes.

For example:

- Keanu Reeves (who I adore) in "Dracula" (what was anyone thinking with that one??)
- Grease 2 (it was on TV this weekend ... loved it as a dumb kid ... got over it)
- plowing through way too many pints of Ben & Jerry's Chunky Monkey the summer after college graduation, therefore gaining a Chunky Monkey butt (a sad yet true story)
- Milli Vanilli
- Al Gore saying he invented the Internet (love ya, Al, but d'oh!)
- the Darwin Awards
- getting a tattoo with a boyfriend/girlfriend's name on it (Johnny Depp had "Winona Forever" on his arm, I believe. After that relationship died, he had it altered to say "Wino Forever")
- Adding a third cat to the mix in our house--which led to the great peeing incidents of '06. But we love her and can't just get rid of her. So we're dealing.
- Deciding to start a cemetery magazine while at the same time finishing "Cemetery Walk" and planning all the stuff that went with that. That was crazy talk! And co-organizing a live cemetery walk at a local cemetery at the same time. And teaching classes. And working fulltime. And ...

You get my point. We all have our issues and we all make our own mistakes. That's what life is about, right? Making mistakes, learning from them and loving life no matter what it throws at us. I used to say in college that life was just a series of things we have to get over. But that's rather pessimistic. Sure life has up times and down times. I'm fortunate to have a supportive family and group of friends as well as an amazing husband to share my life with. I'm very fortunate. I also have a group of people who cheer me on in my extra endeavors--all my taphophile friends! You guys make all the efforts I put into Epitaphs and the website and other things worth while.

And on that thankful note, I'm going to sign off for the night. Baby and I have some sleeping to do soon!

Minda

2006-07-25T11:25:00.000-07:00

I am happy, relieved and peeing a lot.

I have news to share. I DO NOT have gestational diabetes! Hooray! A little over a week ago I went to see my OB for my glucose test. The results came back high (156, and they do the 3-hour glucose test if it's over 136). I was very upset by the prospect of having gestational diabetes. Would the baby be healthy? What would I eat? Would it be enough for her to be healthy? It seemed everything I read gave only basic information and was scary. "Gestational diabetes is the most common ailment in pregnant women. It's not good and can cause high baby birth weight, leading to cesarians or broken baby bones from being too big for the birth canal ... or stillbirth." WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!?! And that's where many of the books I picked up ended on this topic. What a frightening, horrible thing to do to a pregnant woman! And it's so nice to scare pregnant woman.

I was on the Web searching for information on what I needed to do if I did have GD, and it was just no real help. One of the few times my friend the Web has let me down. It's been a rough week and a half. I went in to the hospital Saturday morning for the 3-hour test. If you haven't had one of these or don't have a woman in your life who has, it goes like this. You fast for 12 hours. Then you go in and the nurse gives you a bottle of a chilled drink (mine was about 8 oz of orange-flavored stuff). The drink is like soda pop syrup. If you've ever had Coke syrup for a queasy stomach, you get the idea. But imagine 8 oz of it. I certainly haven't craved orange pop since.

Oh, before you drink the stuff, they take your blood so they have the fasting version of it. Then you drink the stuff and go sit in the waiting area for an hour. Then you go back in to have more blood drawn. Then you go wait an hour. This repeats until you've been stuck a total of 4 times with a needle and have hung out for 3 hours. It's not terrible, but there are a lot of other things I would have rather been doing. At least my mom was there to pass time with me, then Bill came and spent the rest of the time. I had also brought along my jewelry supplies, since I figured I could "work hard for the money" while waiting since I wasn't able to make the cold hard cash at the Farmer's Market like I usually do on Saturdays.

The good news is that the lab was super quick with my results; they sent them to my OB Monday. The great and awesome news is that I don't have glucose problems. No diabetes, gestational or otherwise. And, I tell you, I was worried. I'm sure you can figure out why with the above rant.

So I'm happy. And I'm also happy nothing is wrong with me otherwise. Here's the rest of the fun stuff. Last Thursday morning I woke up with weird cramping. I didn't know if it was Braxton-Hicks contractions (the "practice" contractions I had heard a little about that pregnant women get) or if something was wrong. They were kind of painful like menstrual cramps, though at least not horrible. I had no other symptoms except for lower back pain/soreness, but that's typical. I waited around until 8:30 a.m. when my OB's office opened and gave them a call. I was scheduled to come in that afternoon. So I went to work for a couple hours and then got a call to come in to the OB early at 11 a.m. instead due to an emergency surgery the doctor had scheduled. Mom met me there and went in with me. I was hooked up to a baby monitor for her heartbeat and a monitor for contractions, which was high up on my abdomen. I told the the sensations were actually very low, but they hooked it up high.

It turns out they were not contractions and probably not Braxton-Hicks, but quite possibly the cramping was caused by the bladder infection they discovered I had. Yuck. Not fun. That totally made sense though since I'd been super cranky all week. Nothing like one of those to ruin your mood. Now I'm on meds and finally feeling better (almost a week better). But not before I had the sensations again throughout the weekend and then a whole bunch of times yesterday. The OB said to come in again just in case. But they still weren't contractions, thank goodness, but now they think they are ligaments pulling as my body stretches for growing baby. It's always something! I need to post a pic of pregnant me so you can see the belly I've got going on. It's huge!

So this is all that's been going on on top of regular work, jewelry work and trying to get the magazine out to the masses. It's STILL at the printer! They are really bogged down with other projects. I use the Print Center at the college I work for (Palmer College of Chiropractic--I'm an 11-year employee!), and this is a big crunch time with our huge homecoming event coming up in a few weeks. So I apologize to those of you who are waiting impatiently or patiently for the next issue. It will be out soon, I promise!

I'm also working ahead on the fourth issue so that it's in the bag by the time the baby gets here. So if you have anything you want to submit, do it soon. It's really staring to come together.

All right, my lunch is over and I've already written a novella here. I just have so much to say! :)

I will post some pics of baby Annabella's 4D ultrasound when I locate the CD. I'll also get a pic of myself up soon so you can see me in my pregnant glory.

Hope everyone is doing well!

Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2006-07-17T07:56:00.000-07:00

Things that make me cranky ...

I am just under 7 months pregnant, and I should be happy and glowing. Instead I am cranky and sweaty. It was already 80 degrees when I woke up this morning and will be around 100 as the day goes on. In the Midwest we have this little thing most call humidity. I call it a living hell. As I write this, I am snacking on ice cubes. I think that if a person has to be this miserable (I slept snuggled up with an ice pack last night to relieve some of the heat), that person should at least be in someplace awesome--like, say, New Orleans. The high for NOLA today is going to be 90. Our high is going to be 99. I'd rather be in my favorite city eating po' boys and beignets and drinking virgin hurricanes (if they have such a thing) than in this armpit. If it's going to be this frickin' hot, I'd rather be in New Orleans.

Another thing that makes me cranky is that we had our air conditioning fixed a month or so ago, but the air can't compete with this heat. Our house hasn't cooled below 80 in more than a week. Hopefully Bill will be calling the AC guys for them to fix it. Of course, I'm sure they are more than a bit busy right now.

The third thing that makes me cranky is spammers. Evil spammers have infiltrated my website survey for TheCemeteryClub.com. So I took the sucker down, even though it's a useful tool. Silly me thought it would end all the spam. Here's how it goes. These idiots get into people's surveys and answer EVERY question with their website address. I've gotten gambling site spammers and a host of others. Let me tell you, this DOES NOT make me want to visit their sites. It makes me want to hack them (if I knew how) and destroy them. Okay, well, not really. But it does make me mad. But I thought that taking down the survey--and I mean erasing it from existence--would stop the insanity. It did not. I'm getting just as many as before. Maybe 30 a day or more. So the info must have been passed on to a list. I'm not sure how to stop it. So my mail box fills up with the worst and stupidest spam ever.

So I guess this doesn't make the most happy-go-lucky post I've made, but it's a nasty hot summer and I'm pregnant. In two days we'll be starting our 3rd trimester. Mid October will come pretty fast now.

The good news is that the 3rd issue of Epitaphs Magazine will be at the printer tomorrow. And for those who ordered copies of "Cemetery Walk," those books have come in and will be mailed today.

I hope everyone is staying cool and enjoying life. Now that I've cooled off, I'm feeling much better about things.

Later gators,
Minda

2006-06-27T11:47:00.000-07:00

Babies, Ghosties and Chocolate Pudding and Bananas

Annabella is moving around a lot today. It could be the bavarian cream-filled donut and strawberry fritter I ate earlier today. The thing is that I woke up this morning from a dream in which I was eating a whole bunch of delicious gourmet pastries. By the time I left for work, I was craving pastries so bad that I HAD to stop at Schnuck's grocery store for donuts. Not gourmet pastries, but good enough for me. So that was my morning. But I did have an Ensure Healthy Mom shake drink, too. I wasn't totally bad.

I'm wiped today. Maybe it's a sugar crash. Maybe it's all the stuff on my mind. Both, probably. My husband's job doesn't seem to be so long term. One of our cats has pee issues (she's very insecure and her arch nemesis--our newest cat--constantly ticks her off). Bills, bills, bills. Making sure the summer issue of the magazine gets done ASAP. Making more jewelry (which I can do tonight as hubby is working ridiculously late hours tonight). Getting the house baby ready. Getting the house ready for our Tastefully Simple party in a week and a half. Regular work. Blah blah blah. You know, the usual.

Anyway, over lunch I read my pal Shane Brown's article in The Leader, one of our local newspapers, which was about his experience with a group of ghost investigators. First he wrote an article on DIEPART, the Des Moines, Iowa-based group, then he wrote his column on his experience joining them on an investigation.

Here's the link to Shane's blog. Unfortunately, he has yet to post his ghostie column. But he's such a hoot to read that I recommend that you visit and check out his stuff.

http://shanebrown.blogspot.com/

I checked the Argus/Dispatch site (qconline.com/), but didn't see anything regarding either article. It's probably in the you-must-pay section.

Anyway, I contacted the ghost investigators to see if they would be interested in being interviewed for the fall issue of Epitaphs Magazine. Who knows, maybe I will be able to go on an investigation with them! How cool would that be?

Here is a link to their site: www.diepart.com

As for the last part of my title for this installment, I just have to say that taking a fresh banana and dipping it into chocolate pudding is fantastic. I highly recommend it. And here I sit with a banana on my desk and no pudding in sight. I weep.

Well, maybe it's not that bad, but that pudding sure would taste good. It seems baby Annabella has as much of a sweet tooth as her mother. Wish me luck in a few weeks on my glucose test! Must lay off the sugar before that happens.

Epitaphs update: I should be getting the proof today and we should be going to print soon!

My next wild idea: I'm contemplating the possibility of becoming a Tastefully Simple rep and having those parties and such. I'm afraid I'm becoming very domesticated. It's a little scary and weird. But I'm all about the weird, so I guess it's okay. What do you guys think? Can you imagine me going home to home and giving Tastefully Simple parties? Does that totally freak you out, or what?

Until later,
Minda and baby Bella

2006-06-12T21:30:00.000-07:00

The nursery.

Here are some photos of the nursery so far. Since it is 11:30 p.m. and WAY past my bedtime, I'm going to post some of these pics sideways for lack of time. I usually go to be by 10 p.m. and read, but tonight I got caught up in baby registry stuff. Bill and I are registered at Target.com and Walmart.com, and it has been super fun zapping stuff in the stores or clicking on them online. Babies need a lot of stuff! Right now I'm using our registries as lists of things we want and things we MAY want. It's a great way to keep track of things while we browse around. If you go to Target, you will see the Classic Pooh theme we're using in the nursery.

Well, Shakespeare and Nola (the cats featured on the nursery chair) are going at it AGAIN. Nola is a total brat. Shakespeare is mainly trying to herd me into bed. She's Nanny Shakespeare, you know.

Good-night all!
Minda

2006-06-12T21:22:00.000-07:00

It's a GIRL!!!

We had our ultrasound on Thursday, June 8, and found out our baby is healthy, wonderful ... and a girl! Her name is Annabella, and here are her first pictures!

Beaming with love,
Minda

2006-06-06T11:50:00.000-07:00

What a Croc: Crazy Dream and Crocs

Yesterday I finally went out and bought my second pair of Crocs. If you don't have a pair of these odd-looking yet wonderful shoes, love comfort and hate stinky shoes, go out and buy some right now! Usually I'm not all about going for what's trendy or the "in" thing, but these are some pretty fab shoes. Crocs.com is where you can check them out. But they are sold all over, in places such as Coach House, Hallmark stores and other random places. The cool thing is that no matter where you go, they are $30. Doesn't matter if you go to a hoity toity place. They must be sold for $29.99 or $30. And while I feel like a betrayer of my longtime favorite shoe maker, Birkenstock, I must say I do prefer my Crocs even to those. I'll tell you why.

They are bacteria-resistant. I'm not kidding! I wear a lot of shoes with no socks, and these just don't stink! I've had my first pair (sage beach style) more than a year and still no smelly shoes!

They have non-marking, slip-resistant soles. They were originally made for boating.

They float! They are made of sturdy foam and weigh a total of 6 oz. They weigh nothing!

They are totally comfy and wear well. Orthotic molding and what have you. My old pair still fits me great and have not broken down. I just bought the navy beach style ones yesterday to have another color.

Plus, you buy them roomy. So this way if my feet swell with pregnancy, I should still be able to wear them.

Okay, so I'm waxing poetic about shoes. But it's great to buy a pair and not have to worry about breaking them in. And now that my body is changing all the time with nearly 22 weeks of baby on board, it's nice to have comfort in the shoe area.

Speaking of baby, we have our ultrasound in 2 days!!! We are soooo excited. My parents are, too. They're coming with us to see the little baby. As of tomorrow, baby will be 22 weeks along. Then in 5 more weeks, we'll be in our third trimester already! Time is flying.

We are still back and forth on a boy's name. Bill keeps offering up ones like Otis and Nigel. We were liking Benjamin a lot, but Bill has a long-lost nephew of that name, and he wants the baby to have his own identity (even though he hasn't seen this nephew in ages and I've never even met him). But I understand. We are pretty set on our girl's name. Though, like my mom points out, we could totally change our mind once we see the kid in person.

We watched "Awesomely Bad Celebrity Baby Names" or something like that last night on VH1. It's safe to say we will not be naming out baby Pilot Inspektor, Coco, Heaven, Godd'iss Love something, Denim or Diesel. I'm all for different names, but some names are just silly. Take Banjo, for instance. Yikes.

If you are wondering about the dream mention in the title of this post, it's because I'm having totally wack dreams as of late. In one, I yelled at all the uppity ups I work for, told them off, then quit. ACK!!!! I like my job! I like working here! Sometimes it's a bit crazy, but where isn't? But, boy, I really gave it to them in the dream! Then this morning I woke up from a dream in which I was totally cranky in it, and then got worse.

I was in a mall looking to buy a microwave. It's not that I need to buy one in real life. Ours is fine. But I had to buy one in the dream and went to this super lame store in the mall. Everything was everywhere and not organized. So I finally got the attention of a sales person who was a young, very tall guy. He was also completely clueless. "Where can I find the microwaves?" I ask. "Um. (silence) Um, yeah. (silence) They're, um, right over here," doofus says and points to a mini refrigerator. And then to another one. "One of these should work for you." "That's a refrigerator," I say, starting to get super annoyed. "Yeah, and it should work for what you need," he says, wanting to not have to help any customers, especially me. This is when I lose it.

"What part of microwave do you not understand?!?!?!?!?!" I yell at the doofus. "I want something that heats things, not cools them down!!!!!!" And I storm off and find another person. "Where are your microwaves? I need a microwave!" New doofus: "Um, we have one over here and then some way over there." This is by far the stupidest store I've been into. But for some reason, I REALLY need a microwave and I end up buying one of them.

For you dream interpreters out there, I don't even want to know what these dreams mean! :-)

On the Epitaphs Magazine front, issue #3 is with our designer. Go, Kristy, go! It will soon be with the printer. There's the potential problem right there. We are fast approaching the end of the fiscal year for our printer, so they are super booked. So cross your fingers that the issue comes out by the end of June. Otherwise, all will receive their copies in early July. It won't be the end of the world if it happens, though. This baby is helping me put things in perspective.

Here's wishing you a good week!

Minda

TheCemeteryClub.com

2006-05-19T11:47:00.000-07:00

Eudora Welty and all that jazz.

Bill and I went to the Figge Art Museum, Bill's current employer, last night to see Jazz at the Figge, featuring the Charles Davis Quartet. It was a lovely evening, especially since we were also able to see a portion of the current exhibition: "Passionate Observer -Eudora Welty - Among Artists of the Thirties." Here's a link to some of her images. They are fantastic.

Examples of Eudora Welty's photography

Black and white photography is my favorite artistic medium. Especially of people and the capturing of moments. I think a lot more can be said in black and white. The lack of color allows your mind to fill in the colors on your own. There's more depth. The shadows are deeper.

After viewing part of the exhibition and then sitting in the auditorium waiting for the jazz to begin, I wrote this in response to Welty's work:

She gazes at me from her place on the wall.
She doesn't know me and I don't know her,
but it doesn't matter.
Her stare--blatant as only two stranger can share--goes through me.
In an instant she knows not only who I am but what I am.
She can see the blood in my veins and how my heart palpitates at the thought of her.
She knows my secrets.
Her stare deepens, but she doesn't speak. I don't speak.
My tongue is gelatin. She is still. Life. Caught motion.

I walk away, leaving her with what she knows.
I want to take her with me, but she is not mine to take.
She doesn't need me. There's no ownership.
I walk away leaving a part of myself behind.

"Portrait--A Poem"
by Minda Powers-Douglas
5-18-06

Before the jazz quartet started, I felt the baby flutter.

Minda

2006-05-17T14:47:00.000-07:00

"Take three breaths."

That's the advice I received today from my friend T.C. after he read my blog. Yes, he's right. I need to chill. My first step in this direction was to talk to a friend who is very centered and who advised me to do some throat chakra exercises. That has helped some. Then a few minutes ago I schedule an appointment at the massage therapy school for tonight. So the baby and I will go in for a one-hour massage then go home and watch our favorite TV show "Lost"--breaking only to check on the last few minutes of "American Idol" to see who's been voted off the island. Luckily, the vote-off show is not one you need to watch all the way through. It's actually quite on the cruel side. As to who I think should win, any of the three deserve it. I like them all. I'm partial to Elliot and Taylor, though. But Katharine is very good. The cool thing is that not one of them is really pop idol material. Pop is not any one of their strong suits. Taylor is soul, Elliott is R&B, and Katharine is an old-fashioned torch singer. They are not Britney/Justin wannabes, and that is cool by me.

Baby update:
Today we are officially 19 weeks along. I have still only felt the baby move once, and that was a few weeks ago. I figure the baby will move when the baby's ready for me to feel it. The nursery is painted and looks wonderful. Bill and I also picked out butter yellow curtains and have those hanging up. The cats think the room is being redone for them, especially Nola. While we were painting (Mom, Dad, my aunt Connie and cousin Sheri--THANK YOU!), Nola stayed in the room almost the whole time. She also got paint on her paw and ran around like a maniac. A little bit later I found the place under the window (where she had been lounging) where the paw print was. She is such a mega dork. India, our middle cat, also thinks the room is for her. She likes to lounge on the floor like queen of the world. Shakespeare, our oldest and my long-time girl, owns the entire house, so it's no big deal to her.

Bill and I have also decided on baby names for a girl and a boy. That is a major relief for me. Takes some stress off. Because what if the ultrasound on June 8 showed us the baby is a boy? And all we had was our girl name picked out! And even if the boy name changes later on, at least I'll know what to call the baby for the time being. It is a relief.

I'm back in the jewelry business. I took the weekend off due to nursery stuff. Tracey and I also didn't go to the Farmer's Market because of the rain and how cold it was on Saturday. I'm going myself this weekend, as Trace and John are heading to Phoenix on Thursday. It's supposed to be nice and 70s Saturday, so it will be lovely. Let me see if I can get the link to work this time to Tracey's website. I had it wrong in a previous post.

AndTheBeadGoesOnJewelry.com

Now you far away friends can see what I'm working on all the time! I make the silver plated stretch bracelets in adult, teen and youth (or as I call them "cutie") sizes. They are the best bracelets! And they're only $5! The cuties are only $3. If you go to Tracey's site, you can click on the pics and see bigger, more clear photos. The one I have on here is pretty dark.

So this is my part-time job. I love it! I enjoy it and make a pretty good little cut. Plus I get to work with a good friend and make pretty things. It's low stress, too. Very important. And I can sit on my couch and make them in my pajamas if I want to! Of course, keeping Shakespeare out of the beads and stuff is a little difficult sometimes. She does love pretty things.

Epitaphs Magazine update:
I am ordering a limited printing of issues #1 and #2 this week. Copies will be sold at the Association for Gravestone Studies annual conference next month in Pennsylvania. I will have a small number on hand as well. For issue #1, this will take care of the long-time back orders we've had and leave me with a small handful of extras. But when they sell out, they sell out. I'm not printing anymore. This will be the case with issue #2 as well.

Issue #3 will be out in late June. I'm editing it right now. The articles are great, and we got a number of really good photos sent in. Thanks to everyone who took part!

Well, my co-worker is ready to go (he's a late-stayer) and I left my office keys at home. So I'm out of here. Off to my massage!

Minda

TheCemeteryClub.com

2006-05-14T08:19:00.000-07:00

So much going on. Happy Mother's Day.

We painted the baby's room yesterday. It looks lovely. Now the computer room is filled with the rest of the stuff from the baby's room I haven't found a place for yet. It never ends! And I want to haul stuff out of the house into the garage and move other stuff back into the nursery, but my husband says no way. Yes, I'm pregnant and it would be dumb, but I just want to get it all done. And his schedule is so ridiculous lately. He has a "day" job but also works Saturdays and Tuesday and Thursday nights. And since he's a caricature artist, he's also working at after-prom parties (4 weeks in a row) from around midnight to 3 or 4 in the morning) on Saturday nights. Today (and yesterday) he's working at the museum booth at the Beaux Arts fair in downtown Davenport. Aside from the fact that he's working long, thankless hours (7 days this week with no break), it's only been 47 degrees and rainy out for days. He felt like he was getting pneumonia yesterday! To top it off, because people aren't stupid and taking their kids out in this mess, they only had 28 people stop by their tent and do the activity they are offering. He was there from 9:30 a.m. to 4:30 p.m. Thankless and ridiculous.

Just because they've ALWAYS had this fair on Mother's Day weekend doesn't mean they still should. Many years ago, May was pretty nice in this Midwestern area. But in the past 10 years at least, it's always been crappy. So move the date down! People are wasting their time and money setting up their booths with their fancy arts just to be rained on. It's so silly.

So, anyway, I'm looking forward to seeing my husband for more than an hour or two at a time. And half that time he's fallen asleep because he's so tired. It's getting to him and it's getting to me.

How am I doing? I'm 18 and a half weeks pregnant, I'm dropping weight instead of gaining it, and I'm having panic attacks. Work is stressful, my husband is miserable but keeping his chin up, the house is a wreck, my mind is spinning all the time, I have a magazine to produce right now, I just got an e-mail from a woman who received her copy of the magazine but not the book (which I am sure I mailed in the same package...argh), my uterus is stretching and does not feel pleasant at all, etc.

The panic attacks suck. They basically are making me feel like my throat is closing up. Almost all the time. I had problems with these before, a few years ago. Bill says I need to take more time to just relax. And I do. But I have so much going on. I've got the new magazine issue and old ones to reprint. I've decided though that once I do this reprint of issue #1, that is it for that one. People have been on hold for it for a while, but I haven't had enough to warrant a print order yet. Now I do, but once these are gone, they are gone. Limited edition or what have you. One thing I'm learning is how to know when to say when. When.

As to anything else cemetery related, the magazine is it. And any help I can get on that front with people sending in articles, photos, poetry, etc., will be great. And advertisements. My dream of getting the price of the mag lowered by getting a nice number of advertisers per issue is not coming together at all. I blame awareness of our super-cheap ads and the economy. If you have a small business, how can you even afford to keep it alive right now? It stinks. But let me tell you how "thrilled" I was to hear that Congress and the President are passing through yet another tax break for rich people. Well, that's just fab! While the rest of us are selling plasma to get by, the rich keep getting more help. Save the rich people! They pay more in taxes than my friends and family and I make in a year--all together! I don't know who voted this man into office (except himself), but he is far from "for the people." Our government is adding to my panic attacks. And don't get me started on the panic the media is trying to create over the bird flu pandemic possibility. Doesn't it seem like every time one of our presidents slides in popularity or starts/continues a war that some form of panic-inducing issue is brought up to scare us all? I know all about the bird flu; I read the book. It's called "The Stand," and Stephen King wrote it. All the stuff they're saying about it sounds just like the horror book. Captain Tripps is on the way so they say; and if it's not, the government will make it so.

Enough of that rant. It's just that I'm sick of hearing my dad and others go on about how a TV movie says that if the bird flu hits (which could be around THE BIRTH OF MY BABY), that it will "circle the world three times," blah blah blah. It's a scare tactic. A nation or world full of fear is easily controlled.

Well, I better start working on organizing this house again. I plan on bundling up and visiting my husband at his booth, too. Poor guy wore his winter coat today!

Happy Mother's Day to all the moms out there!

Minda

2006-05-04T06:20:00.000-07:00

Baby update - Week 17

This is from BabyCenter.com

"How your baby's growing: Your baby weighs about 5 ounces now, and he's around 5 inches long — about the size of a large onion. He can move his joints, and his skeleton — until now rubbery cartilage — is starting to harden to bone. His sense of hearing is also developing. The umbilical cord, his lifeline to the placenta, is growing stronger and thicker.

"How your life's changing: With more weight up high and out in front of your body, you may feel a bit off-balance as you walk around. Store away your high heels and wear low-heeled shoes to reduce your risk of taking a tumble. You're likely to feel protective of your tummy, and that's good. Trauma to your abdomen could be harmful to your baby and dangerous to you, so be sure to buckle up when you're driving. Keep the lap portion of the seat belt under your belly and very snug across your hips for maximum protection."

So my baby's an onion! Oh no! :-) Last week, the baby was the size of an avacado. Much less stinky.

I can feel how my uterus is growing to accommodate the growing baby. I feel a stretching sensation and have for the past few days or so. It feels like mild period cramps. Our next OB appointment is on Monday, and I believe Bill and I will be able to schedule our ultrasound then for sometime after 20 weeks. Everything is getting so exciting!

We have the paint for the nursery. It's a soft, pale green called Clair de Lune by PPG (I tried to find a sample of it online, but no go). We plan on painting the weekend after this one. But the house changes have already begun. Bill has been cleaning like a madman. It's great! And my dad came over last weekend to install a shower for us. Ever since we moved in five years ago, we've only had a bathtub. It's an old house with a clawfoot tub, which is cool. But the rounder I get, the harder it is to get in and out. So Dad saves the day!

We have the nursery furniture ready to go, though still in boxes until we finish painting. It's the Ellis collection from Simplicity. The crib is pictured above. We also have the matching dresser and changing table dresser. We've decided on the Classic Pooh collection at Target, though I still registered for this cute Safari set. I don't want everyone to think we only want Pooh stuff! Besides, the other set is sooooo very cute. Plus, it's not like we're going to be all "get us only this!" on things. Gifts are gifts, as far as showers are concerned. We'll be thrilled no matter what.

So that's the latest in baby news. I'll keep you posted!

As far as writing is concerned, I've put the New Orleans cemeteries book on hold and have also set aside the fiction ghost story for a while. I'm currently focusing on getting the nursery ready and preparing for the baby. I'm also working for a friend by making jewelry. I really enjoy doing it, and the pieces are gorgeous. She actually has a good side business going. We're going to start going to the local farmer's market again this Saturday. Tis the season! We had a lot of fun last year there. I'm also helping her with jewelry parties. The nice thing is that her stuff is beautiful and inexpensive. $5 for a bracelet! If you want to support my friend Tracey's small business (and me!), check out her site at Andthebead.com. This link may not be working right now, though. I was having trouble accessing it today. More on all this good stuff later.

2006-05-01T06:32:00.000-07:00

My own personal boycott

5-1-06

First, I suppose this post should be offering a happy May Day or Mabon. It's a celebration that spring is here and that all the blossoms and green things are finally appearing after many dreary months. So hooray!

The original reason I decided to post this morning is because of a movie. Again I am venting about something in the entertainment industry. This time it is the movies that have my attention.

A movie fan since perhaps birth and a strong proponent of freedom of speech, I am adamantly protesting a current release. "United 93" has upset me since I first heard the film was in production--so has the Oliver Stone movie about the twin towers, which is due this summer.

I first saw a full preview for "United 93" more than a month ago when I saw "Inside Man." I was appalled. This terrible tragedy happened less than five years ago, and we already have people capitalizing on the loss of lives, the families of those who were killed, and the emotions of the American public.

There is an article on Yahoo today about the release of the film and quotes from people who went. One man said the film should be released because "it's too soon to forget." Exactly how many people have forgotten what happened on Sept. 11, 2001? How many people have forgotten one of those most horrifying events of American history? Are we all that stupid and forgetful? Do people assume that all of us have a form of ADD? Yes, it IS too soon to forget, because WE HAVEN'T. Movies like "Saving Private Ryan" are important because there are generations in existence that have no idea of what happened during WWII. But any of us who are old enough to attend "United 93" REMEMBER the events of that day all too well. Why do we need to be "reminded" of it in such a horrific way? Because someone saw the chance to make money off of it. I do not believe the filmmakers were being totally honorable in their intentions. We all know what this country is built on--capitalism.

"It's too soon to forget." How ridiculous that statement is. When will it be soon enough to forget? It never will be. We don't need to be patronized. What we need is to come together as a nation and figure out how we can make the world a place where things like this never happen again. That is how we can truly honor those who lost their lives in this horrible tragedy.

2006-04-26T07:54:00.000-07:00

How a perfectly entertaining show can ruin the world ... or at least your day.

4/26/06

So this season I'm an American Idol fan. I've been enjoying the show and keeping up with it for the most part. Last night I missed the performances but did at least see the recap. And I did vote for my favorites. Actually I voted for everyone EXCEPT the bane of this year's Idol--Kellie Pickler. Pickler is exactly how a perfectly entertaining show can ruin the world.

This doesn't have anything to do with cemeteries, but as it does have to do with the demise of good taste, I'm going to share.

Kellie Pickler does have some talent. Not as much talent as she thinks she does, but she does have some. The thing is, she is not anywhere near the caliber of the rest of the contestants. But she is cute and she is blonde. Something about this country puts out the vibe that blonde = good (i.e. sexy, something to strive for, something to be jealous of, etc.). She is also country. I'm not a contemporary country fan and freely admit that. But that is not the reason why I dislike Pickler so much. She can sing country, and good for her for that. So can a lot of people, though. And a lot of Americans like contemporary country. That's there deal. But I do have to wonder if a large number of Americans also equate country as equaling good. Whether it truly is or not.

Some examples of good country are Dolly Parton, Johnny Cash, Allison Kraus and Union Station, etc. Classics. Your Hank Williams, Gene Autry and such. My grandfather was in a country/cowboy band back in the 1940s and 50s. Real country has soul and roots. Line dance style music really can't compare. But I digress.

Back to Pickler.

This is what shakes my tree the most--how phony she is. "Salmon" with an L. "I can't understand your accent. I don't have an accent." "I never had a _________ before." No one is that stupid acting unless they have a purpose. Her purpose is to win people over with the dumb blonde stereotype. Granted, there are people who say she is charming or think she is funny. For me, shallow people are like migraines. I don't want them around.

Consider the image this girl is projecting. I did a search online to see what exactly it is about Pickler that is getting her votes on AI. There is a contingent of people like myself who say she is annoying, fake and needs to go. Then there are the people who follow VoteTheWorst.com and vote for the worst person on Idol to see if they can prove that the producers will keep bad people until almost the end and then not let them win. I see what they are trying to do, but it ticks me off. There are people who really enjoy the show and want the talented ones to move forward. I'd rather move forward and see how it plays out for real.

Then we have the "We LOVE Kellie!!!!!" fans. They think she is nice and sweet and can sing like a bird. They say she is just wonderful. I found these fans on the Idol site on Pickler's message board. These are the 9-year-olds. Mainly girls but also boys. The image this Pickler is projecting is this: it's good to act stupid, it's good to be pretty, and it's okay to be mediocre if you act stupidly "charming" as long as you're pretty. I taught Girls Make a Difference workshops for five years to help girls understand that they are valuable people who contribute to the world around them. That's it's not about fitting into whatever mold of beauty is currently popular, it's about being yourself and respecting and loving yourself for who you are.

Can you see now why I can't stand Pickler?

Young girls have a hard enough time living day to day and dealing with the pressures of life that they don't need bad role models on the TV shows they enjoy. When Girls Make a Dif was still in session, Britney Spears was at the height of her popularity. She was also a "Slave 4 U" and wore very little clothing. She was quoted as saying she didn't ask to be a role model and therefore didn't need to take responsibility for the influence she had on young people, especially girls. But the thing is that she DID have influence and it didn't matter if she asked for it or not. With great power comes great responsibility, as a wise comic book character once said.

Our young people are precious. All of us are responsible for all of them. They are too important for us to neglect just because some of us want to "make it big."

Thanks for reading,

Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2006-03-21T10:20:00.000-08:00

Epitaphs Magazine issue #2 is DONE and SENT! And thank goodness for that. This issue was driving me bonkers! Don't get me wrong, it's a great issue. The thing was, it was like it had the curse of the Black Pearl on it. But all delays aside, it's out and I'm sure you'll be pleased with it.

In this issue you'll get to meet our designer, Kristine. I think you'll agree she does exceptional work. You'll also see some familiar writers, some new ones and a couple of photographers named Jeffrey.

As for issue #3, work has already begun on its production. Even though #2 was late by a few weeks, we are still going to release the May issue on time. Then we'll have the August issue. But I'm not going to make any special promises about the November issue, as my baby is due Oct. 11! I'll do what I can. :-)

Which brings me to something interesting. If you've visted TheCemeteryClub.com lately (and our steady visits say people have), you may have noticed that I posted that I will be selling some funerary items on eBay soon. It's funny, ever since I found out I was pregnant, I've had the desire to get rid of many of my funeral home collectibles. And I haven't been diving into cemetery literature like I usually do. It must be a maternal instinct to keep even the notion of death away from my child even before the baby is born. It, of course, also doesn't hurt to earn a little bit of cash for when the baby comes. My biggest concern, aside from my chld, is that these items go to good homes. My original plan was that if I kept these items as a collection that I would eventually (many, many years down the road) will them to the Museum of Funeral Customs in Springfield, Ill. These special items tend to be tossed out like so many other promotional items that people think of as cheap plastic crap or what have you until decades later when they have an interest again. My main concern now is that they find good homes. If you are a collector and are interested in some of my items and would like to make an offer off of eBay, I would be willing to talk, too. I'm always up for a fair deal.

By the way, this is a totally different subject but also very important. In the current issue of the International Cemetery and Funeral Association's magazine has a book review of "Cemetery Walk" and also mentions the magazine! It's a favorable review, and I hope it inspires a lot of interest in the book, mag and Web site. I've already had one survey filled out from an ICFA member. Super sweet!

I hope all is well in your parts of the world. I feel like I'm getting back in the swing of life as the baby hormones start balancing out. As of tomorrow, I'll officially 11 weeks along.

Happy cemetery haunting,
Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2006-03-13T15:46:00.000-08:00

We're having a baby! Wow and holy cow!

A few weeks ago, my husband Bill and I found out we are having a baby. This is our very first. I'm 33. It has been a life-rocking experience so far. I've gone from "Oh my gosh this is so exciting! We've wanted this for more than a year!" to "Oh...my...gosh...this is freaking me out." It seems like all people talk about is how wonderful and what a blessing it is, yet they forget to tell you the part where you get totally freaked out about it.

Don't get me wrong, it IS a blessing and we are thrilled. It's a very strange kind of thrilled, though. And let me tell you why.

Bill and I tried for a year or so then decided to just forget about it. Within two months, surprise! No wonder I felt so yucky. No wonder I couldn't concentrate on anything. Mind you, I was finishing the second issue of Epitaphs Magazine at the time and also working on my book proposal for my project on post-Katrina New Orleans cemeteries. I got the magazine off to the printer (then experienced problems with it I'm STILL dealing with) and got all of the proposal written except for the 2 sample chapters. But I couldn't concentrate. I was so frustrated. And this was before we knew officially I was pregnant. When I figured out what was probably going on, it was only a couple days before we bought a test. On Feb. 13 the test was positive. Talk about not being able to concentrate! It was freaky!

Ever since then, my mind is still not on track--and those of you who know me know that my mind has lots of tracks. Well, that's changing, I'm sure. And my big plans for 2006 are changing as well.

First, I've been "threatened" by both my husband and my mother about even thinking about going to New Orleans. Between the yuck that may still be down there--especially in the cemeteries--and the heat, my estimated couple of trips are now postponed. As for the status of the book, I'm not sure how that will go. I've lined up a lovely photographer, Jeff (whose work is in the upcoming issue of Epitaphs), to do photos for me if the book is still a go. Of course, I can make no promises to anyone or even myself about such big projects as that for quite a while.

Second, I was so very excited about becoming a celebrant. I was going to sign up for training this September. I'm due Oct. 11. So much for celebrant training!

As far as Epitaphs Magazine goes, all will continue as planned. I'll be starting on the third issue soon, once I get the second issue mailed. This week, I hope hope hope. I know people are frustrated that it hasn't arrived yet. I'm with you on that one.

So, anyway, if any of you cemetery fans are reading this, you have just received a little peek into my world right now. Aside from a lot of nausea, I am doing well. On Wednesday I will be 10 weeks along. Today Bill and I went to the OB for the first time. She also found the baby's heartbeat! It was really amazing. Just think, a new little taphophile will be joining the world soon!

As you can guess, this blog will have a lot to do with baby stuff for a while. But I'm going to still keep it geared toward my regular stuff as well. It's all entwined. I'm looking forward to nice weather so I can get out into some cemeteries again. I think a good dose of gravestones will help me finish my book proposal or at least figure out where the future of my writing is going to take me. I'm not giving up on the New Orleans cemeteries, though. It just may take me longer than I originally planned to write the book. As you know, New Orleans is ALWAYS calling to me.

All the best and happy cemetery haunting,

Minda and the munchkin

2006-02-05T17:11:00.000-08:00

The Celebrant Plot Thickens

I told Mom on Monday about my plans to become a celebrant and take the training in September. She thought it was really cool. Then today, the following Sunday, Bill and I went to breakfast with Mom and Dad, and Mom asks me if I want to go into business with her. She wants to take the celebrant training with me! How cool is that? So we're both going to Minneapolis in September.

If I haven't given the information on celebrancy, do check out Pam Vetter's site: www.celebrantpam.com. She's a super-cool lady and the reason I'm making this life decision. Well, at least the initial catalyst. It was the article I read about the ceremony she performed for Richard Pryor that caught my attention. She has been absolutely wonderful since I first contacted her, too. She's been willing to offer advice and answer my questions. If you are in the California area and are looking for someone to perform a ceremony for you, please contact her. She's great!

As anyone who knows me well can tell you, I'm a research junkie. Unfortunately I'm finding that there is not a whole lot of information available on celebrancy at this point. While it is big in Australia, it's still growing in the States. But I can be patient.

Plus, it's not like I don't have plenty going on right now. I'm still working on my book proposal, I just turned in my presentation proposal for the Museum of Funeral Customs symposium this fall ... and I'm now taking a painting class. Yes, you read right, a painting class. I haven't painted since junior high. Wait. I take that back. I painted a costume design in my Theatre Design class my senior year of college. We used gouche paints. But before that, the last painting I did was of a clown in orange tones with acryllics.

So this is the perk of being married to the studio art coordinator for the Figge Art Museum. Employees and their families can take classes for free. What a deal! Once I get a piece finished, I promise to post it on this blog. Then you can laugh amongst yourselves! :)

Well, it's time for me to get back to proof-checking the second issue of "Epitaphs Magazine." The fans are waiting.

-Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2006-01-29T16:22:00.000-08:00

But before I go ...

I have some recommendations for y'all.

Spooky movie recommendations:

- "The Grudge" starring Sarah Michelle Gellar ("Buffy"!). LOVE, LOVE, LOVE this movie! It's spooky as hell and a great homage to the original.
- "Ju-On" starring I'm not sure who. This is the movie "The Grudge" was based on. It's even scarier. And leave the subtitles on, because nothing is lamer than bad American dubbing. The story is more in-depth than the American, so watch the American version first. Then scare yourself silly with the second one. Ghost story prime awesomeness!
- "Haunted" starring Aidan Quinn. Great ghost story! A fun, old-fashioned ghost movie.

Book recommendations:

- "Grave Intent" by Deborah LeBlanc. Her writing will get under your skin. This is her second book. Give her a read! Plus, she's a total peach! A real sweetheart of a Cajun! ;-) I'm hoping she'll have a book signing up here in Moline.
- "Harry Potter and ..." by J.K. Rowling. Love them all. Love every one. I can't WAIT TO SEE "Goblet of Fire" on the IMAX screen next weekend. I'm counting down the days!

TV recommendations:
- "Lost" - What a great show! Rent the first season, though. Catch up. You'll be, well, lost if you don't.
- "House" - How can Hugh Laurie be so British when he's so arrogant American? What an interesting, intelligent show that is also kind of playful in a weird way. I love the characters and the medical mysteries.
- "CSI" - Speaking of mysteries, this one has them. It's a great show that makes me feel like I'm let in on a really smart secret. It's also probably why I think I should buy Urine Gone, which is not only seen on TV but also comes with a blacklight so you can see where exactly your cat has peed. Note: I watch the original "CSI" but not the Miami one. David Carruso is weird.
- "Boston Legal" - My new addition to my faves. I started watching it when Michael J. Fox was announced to have a four-episode arc. Not only is he wonderful, but the rest of the cast is brilliant. It's quirky enough to get me to watch a lawyer show, and William Shatner is a hoot!

That's it for today!

Minda

2006-01-29T16:09:00.000-08:00

I finally think I know what I want to be when I grow up.

And it's a celebrant.

I just discovered this today. A celebrant is "is a person who has been trained and certified to meet the needs of families during their time of loss. They serve by providing a funeral service or tribute that is personalized to reflect the personality and lifestyle of the deceased," according to www.InsightBooks.com). They are not religiously affiliated, but provide services for all kinds of people. This is exactly want to do! Aside from writing, of course. I even looked into becoming a funeral director at one time because I wanted to help people through their grief. But I really have no desire to embalm people. I don't have a problem with the practice, but it's just not my thing. Plus, being a funeral director is a tough job--aside from prepping bodies. It's hard work with tough hours.

Anyway, check this out: "According to the American Religious Identification Survey, Americans who answer 'none' when asked to identify their religion numbered 29.4 million in 2001, more than double the 14.3 million in 1990. If unbelievers had their own state--the state of None--its population would be the second largest state: California, 34.5 million; None, 29.4 million, Texas, 21.3 million." George Will, Washington Post 5/5/05

This is fascinating stuff. How I found out about this profession is through a link one of my e-mail listmates sent out (thank you, Stephanie!). It was to a story on Richard Pryor's memorial service. Being spiritual but not religious, the Pryors did not want a religious service. Instead, they hired Pam Vetter (www.celebrantpam.com). I was immediately intrigued and had to learn more. That's when I went to the InsightBooks.com site. I'll keep you posted as I learn more.

If I get a chance tonight when the cats (three of 'em!) are quiet and not being nosey (yeah, right) and Bill is downstairs drawing, I think I'll give my podcast recording a go. We'll see!

For those of you in the Quad-City area, I highly recommend you visit Crazy Wok. It's an Asian fusion restaurant on 53rd in Davenport (a few blocks east of Brady Street--not down on the Borders end of town). It's fabulous! I got the Mango Coconut Fried Rice with cashews, raisins and tofu. Oh my gosh, is it ever good! I'm going to have my leftovers right now!

Gotta run! Delectible Asian food awaits!

Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2006-01-27T07:32:00.000-08:00

Movies and how people screw everything up

I just read an article on AlterNet (http://www.alternet.org/mediaculture/31379/) about how Steven Soderbergh is releasing his new movie "Bubble" in theaters, then showing it days later on HDNET, and then releasing it on DVD only days after that. Why? Because he wants to beat movie piraters at their game.

Beating movie piraters is something I'm all for. With sticks and such. Too many people work too hard to have people steal their work. And I'm not talking about the Steven Spielbergs and the Jerry Bruckheimers of the industry that have more money than the world. I'm talking about those long lists of people in the credits most people bail out on. My husband and I stay for them after every movie we see in the theater. Everyone deserves some recognition.

But back to Soderbergh's new brain scheme. It's not helping matters. Here's the deal. People are not going to movies because they can't afford them. In little Davenport, Iowa, and little Moline, Illinois, movies cost $9 for an adult ticket. A few years ago I visited a friend in Minnesota, and we saw a movie at the Mall of America, the biggest tourist-trap shopping extravaganza in the Midwest. At that time, the movies there cost the same amount at the movies in my much smaller hometown. How disgusting is that?

Why are movie ticket costs so high? Is it the evil movie theaters? Partially. But you can't totally blame them. When it costs $50 million dollars for a movie to be made (and a lower budget one, at that), someone has to pay through the nose for it for the investors to get their money back. "King Kong" didn't do nearly as well at the box office as predicted, not because no one wanted to see it. I'm betting it's because people really didn't have the spare cash. I know a bunch of my friends didn't. One of my good friends loves movies. But times are tight, and movies are now low on his priority list (Thanks, George W., for your tremendous presidenting skills).

So, are people pirating movies because they are broke? Probably some are. Others like the thrill of "getting to see something first." Or of doing something bad but not "really" bad. I know someone in his early 20s who thinks he's awesome because he can get a hold of some movies before they are even released. Why? Who cares? Why would anyone want to watch a crappy bootleg copy of a film on a computer screen or TV? Just to say they did? Whatever. Sounds like a loser who needs to get a girlfriend or boyfriend to me.

Anyway, this article made me want to vent. If people in Hollywood want to make changes that are really going to matter, don't dumb yourself down. Don't lower yourself to the lowest perceived common denomenator. It's insulting. Step up and take real action. The fact that Soderbergh only spent $1.7 million on making this film (which is still, yikes, a lot of money to a poor sot like me) is much more impressive. Keep it real, Steven. And that goes for all filmmakers.

2006-01-24T14:22:00.000-08:00

What's Your Epitaph Say?

Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com

Just a little fun thing sent to one of the lists I'm a member of.

I'm half-way done with the book proposal. I've also started a paper proposal for the Museum of Funeral Customs 2006 Symposium. And I'm going to send in a proposal for the Association for Gravestone Studies annual conference. Gotta get out there! There's info about these conferences at www.TheCemeteryClub.com, if anyone is interested in checking them out.

I've been going to the fitness center at the college I work for off and on for the past month or so. I went yesterday. It's pretty nice. Eliptical machines, treadmills, exercise bikes, stair-steppers, etc. And there's no charge for students or employees. I brought my workout clothes today again, but I've been feeling kind of crappy most of the day. I don't know if I ate something that didn't settle well with me or what. But I know that I don't feel up to getting on a treadmill after work, that's for sure. I think I need a nap.

Otherwise all is well in our little end of the world. I hope it is in yours.

-Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2006-01-18T13:47:00.001-08:00

New book on the way

It has been ages since my last post--over a month! What a slacker.

Here's what's been brewing in my cauldron while my blog has been idle. I held a book signing at Readmore Book World in Moline, Ill., on Dec. 10. There was Christmas and New Year's. I started volunteering for the Animal Aid Humane Society, which is a no-kill shelter near my house. I was on break from my day job for the holidays, which was totally awesome even if I was a little under the weather during a good part of it.

I've been working on the second issue of "Epitaphs Magazine," which is slated for a February release. Kristine, our designer, is working her magic right now.

The main thing I've been working on is the proposal for my second book. I will not be self-publishing this time. This time I am going for it and submitting it to an agent. It's been an interesting process trying to narrow down my topic for the book. At times it's been downright painful. It's tough to figure out your next step. Especially when I'm still working on promoting my first book. It's a major juggling act.

Yesterday I spoke to an advanced class of six students at Bettendorf Middle School (Bettendorf, Iowa). They have taken on the project of creating a walking tour brochure for Oakdale Memorial Park (where I co-directed the cemetery walk last September) in Davenport, Iowa. It was a lot of fun. They were so into what we were talking about that they asked their teacher if they could stay through the next class period.

This weekend I will be teaching a class on "The Ins and Outs of Self-Publishing." If I can help some other people wade their way through the process, then rock on. It can be daunting. The whole process of this book stuff can be daunting. I have enjoyed it very much and continue to, but I won't try to fool you into thinking it's easy and fun. You've got to have a lot of determination and time to get things done. I still need to do some legwork on getting a Borders signing lined up.

In other news, I'm working toward hosting a podcast for TheCemeteryClub.com. If you have any ideas about what you'd like to hear about on the podcast, let me know! I'm open to suggestions.

I plan to blog a little more often, so please stay tuned. Thanks for your continued support and happy cemetery haunting!

Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2005-11-11T11:30:00.000-08:00

Off to New Orleans in 3 Weeks

In just three weeks, I'll be heading to New Orleans. Honestly, I don't know what to expect. I have this image of NOLA in my mind from my previous visits, and then I have the images from the news on TV and in papers and magazines. Then I read articles and blogs online where people are saying it is so much worse than anyone can even imagine. At this point, I don't know how far into the city beyond the French Quarter I will be able to go. I'm flying in and am not getting a rental car. And I don't know if any of the city's areas are closed off at this point.

Admittedly, I am curious to see what this area looks like now. But that is not the reason I'm really going to New Orleans. I'm going to support the city and all the wonderful people I met there. I'm going to help clean up a cemetery. I'm going to meet new people and conduct interviews so that they can have their stories heard. I'm going because I feel the pull to be there. This is the next step.

My husband and I aren't millionaires, far from it. Neither one of us came from families with money. So while growing up I learned how to make a difference in ways that didn't cost a lot of money. Throughout my youth, I felt my best way of making a difference was with my writing. I wrote about important issues for school papers and also wrote a lot of things that I kept to myself or shared only with friends. While I wasn't making a difference to the world, I was making a huge difference to myself. As I grew as a writer, I was able to eventually come out of the shyness I was seemingly born with.

Eventually all my thoughts and ideas grew into Girls Make a Difference, a program I held for girls age 9-14 for five years. I kept the program free because I wanted all interested girls to be able to join. It was wonderful while it lasted, but it was year-round time consuming and was taxing on my bank account. It was time to move on. And writing was calling me.

I decided to write a book. Would it be fiction? Non-fiction? What would it be about? I tried to write a novel. It seemed good at the time, but then I lost interest in the story. It's still rattling around in my head, but I know my true calling is non-fiction. I love doing research. Always have. I love learning new things and figuring out how the new things fit in with the old things I've known. In two years, "Cemetery Walk" was born. And in the middle of that, "Epitaphs Magazine" was born.

I write for a living. I work for Palmer College of Chiropractic in the marketing and communications department. I'm a writer and editor. I edit a monthly newsletter, I write scripts for various video projects, and I do anything else that falls in the category a marketing specialist would take care of. Chiropractic plays an important role in my life. It's primary health care for me and my husband, and the results are excellent.

But while chiropractic is great and I enjoy working to promote it, it is not my calling. I know people who are supposed to be chiropractors, and they are great. I know, though, that for me there is more to my writing than newsletters and brochure copy. There's another book in me, and right now it's waiting to be found in New Orleans.

So if you are in New Orleans and want to say hi, let me know. I'll meet you at Cafe du Monde. It's open, you know!

All the best,
Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2005-11-02T10:59:00.001-08:00

If you want to self-publish with a POD ...

If any of you are interested in self-publishing your own book (whether fiction, non-fiction, poetry, art, photography, children's, etc.) and you are looking for a print-on-demand company, you might consider AuthorHouse. That's who I went through for my book "Cemetery Walk."

If you have any questions about the process or what the experience of working with a print-on-demand (POD) company is like, feel free to e-mail me at minda@thecemeteryclub.com. I'll be honest with you about my experience. There are definite positives and negatives to PODs, but for me at the time, it was the right way to go. If it is for you, check them out. One thing that is very cool is the ability to check your sales online. It's pretty cool.

If you do decide to go with AuthorHouse.com, please mention that I referred you. They have a referral program.

Good luck!

Minda Powers-Douglas

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2005-10-28T07:55:00.000-07:00

Looting and Pillaging

It has been a while since I've blogged. I have excuses, of course. I will share them with you now.

I've been working nearly 70 hours per week between my two jobs as well as planning my book launch event, etc. The book launch took place last Sunday. It was fabulous. More later.

Last night I worked at the Halloween store. It is the second day I've worked this week. While I have been used to the store getting cluttery and downright messy, nothing had prepared me for what I was going to step into Tuesday and Thursday at 5 p.m. (when my shift started). The store is quite large for a temporary business. It is located in a strip mall, and the space it occupies was once an appliance store many moons ago, I'm told. We have nearly every costume imaginable (except some obvious ones, but we only get what we get from corporate), a bunch of props, fake blood, lifesize and ridiculously large rats, fog machines, things that light up, things that talk (waaaay too much), zillions of latex masks ranging in price from $9.99 to $59.99, Halloween make-up, oodles of false eyelashes, vampire teeth, slutty costumes (also known as Legs Avenue), fart machines, dozens of children's Spider-man costumes in one size only (7-10), obscene costumes (including "Tricky Dick" the inflatable penis costume, which we apparently have sold out of), hundreds of wigs, flying bats, styrofoam tombstones, and many other items many people feel they need to have or at least pick up and put down somewhere else in the store.

I am a temporary employee. I make not a whole lot an hour. I have not complained about this because overall I have enjoyed working at the store and helping people shop for the holiday I love. In fact, I've been priding myself on my customer service, keeping the store in good order, sweeping up feathers and such with the little push-roller non-electric Hoover, etc. What a fun job, I had said to myself many a time.

Then the disillusionment began to set in. A few weeks ago I realized that one of my co-workers was really good at telling people what to do, yet not doing a damn thing except sitting on his ass and occasionally checking people out at the register. There is more to life in the Halloween store than attending the register. There is much clean-up and restocking to do. It is not a difficult job. In reality, a trained monkey could probably do it. Pick things up and put them in their appropriate sections in the appropriate spaces. We don't have to price anything, as the items come priced and ready to be put up.

We wear orange shirts. After all, it is a Halloween store, and orange is a seasonal color. It's also easy to pick us out of the crowd. Yet not all of my coworkers wear their shirts. I do not believe it is because they have a disdain for orange as much as they do not want to be recognized as staff. I wear my shirt every time I work, because we are supposed to. For me, this is not a hard concept. I'm also one of those wacky people that tends to follow the rules.

I also do not steal. This is another concept that some of my co-workers allegedly do not understand. Supposedly, a strip mall neighbor saw one of our workers (in this case I use that term loosely as he is not real keen on actually working) waiting out back by our dumpster for his friend's van to pull up. Then he opened the dumpster and pulled out bags of merchandise and put it in the van. As we do not have a register behind the store by the dumpster, I can only assume these goods were, as kids these days say, "hot."

On top of this, I still do not steal. But it seems that others do. I just found out that one of my favorite co-workers was accused of stealing money from the cash registers one night while closing. The money was accidentally left in the cash register by this young woman, so she left a note for the morning people to explain (after closing down the registers, you can't get back into them--a manager has to open them again). The person who opened the next morning reported that the money was missing. He, who is also among the losers who do not do a damn thing in the store, accused my young female co-worker of stealing the cash. I wish I had known about this sooner, as I was the other person closing that night. I saw the money in the drawers and saw her shut them. I was there when she wrote the note and say she hoped she wouldn't get in trouble for leaving the money in the registers (this was a policy that changed recently, so she shut the drawers out of habit).

When the female manager, who is way cool and on top of things, told the owner what happened, he did not believe her. Why? Because the loser who does not work told the owner that the girl did it. The manager told him that it was most likely the loser who did it, because he's been getting away with murder for months. The owner dismissed everything she told him. My young co-worker turned her key in. I had been wondering why I hadn't seen her for a while. This girl is a very hard worker and is dedicated to doing a good job. The manager says that since she (the manager) has no penis that the owner won't listen to her. I told her to wear the big inflatable penis costume the next time she talked to the owner. Perhaps he'd listen then.

Now to the looting and pillaging.

People are animals. That is a generalization, but if you stepped foot into the Halloween store this week, you'd agree.

to be continued

2005-10-17T19:58:00.000-07:00

The local star, that's me.

For all you Quad Citians, I'm somebody! Reporter and arts and entertainment editor David Burke did a story on me for the Quad-City Times on Sunday, Oct. 16. It was the cover of the Arts & Entertainment section. I mean it was the cover! A HUGE photo of me peering through a mausoleum gate. Ironically, it was the same mausoleum I had my picture taken in front of for the Argus/Dispatch a few weeks ago for the Oakdale Memorial Gardens cemetery walk. But it looks totally different to those not as familiar with Oakdale as me (and Dustin, who even drove by while I was being interviewed--such a hard-core taphophile).

The long of the short of it (or something like that):

- The "Cemetery Walk" book launch event is this coming Sunday (hooray!!!). I have no idea how many people will show up. A good number have RSVP'd, and then there's the newspaper article announcing it. It could mean millions. Okay, maybe hundreds. Okay, maybe 100. I'm game.

- Mom is on food and decoration shopping detail. She and Grandma were working on some table decorations tonight. My friend Katie and I also shopped online for wonderful things. It's a Mardi Gras theme.

- One of the food items is called Plantation Curried Fruit. I am so excited about that! Plus, I'm making my famous (at least I think so) Minda's Huck Finn Sweet Potatoes, which were formerly known as Minda's Sweet Potatoes. I added the Huck Finn in homage to my buddy Mark Twain ... and because I was inspired to make them because of a dinner theater performance of "Big River" at Circa '21.

- I dropped off one more coffin press kit today. This one went to Barnes & Noble at NorthPark Mall in Davenport, Iowa. Bill and I also dropped by Borders in Davenport last night, and I talked to Terry. He apologized for not ordering my book sooner. He's already gotten requests for my book! Wow!!! How cool is that? Hopefully that book signing there will come soon. And, of course, I want to do one at Barnes & Noble.

- As my job with the Spirit Halloween store will be ending in a few weeks, I've decided to apply for another part-time job. I decided on Barnes & Noble, as I love books, I've worked at a bookstore before, and it's pretty close to Palmer (my day job). A few years ago I worked at Borders and really like my old co-workers there (Troy, Terry, Brandon ... and Jen is she's still working there). But they had me in the cafe, and while I love making espresso drinks, I do not like making food food. As a mostly vegetarian person, handling meat and such is totally gross to me. So if I did get hired back there, odds are they'd put me back in the cafe. No thank you. If Barnes & Noble offers me cafe work, I'm going to say no thank you. I've got to do something I know I will enjoy or it won't be worth the extra time away from my husband and the time taken away from my book and magazine stuff.

Why am I looking for an extra job, you may be asking? Because I want to finally pay off some medical bills that have been hanging around, and because I want to start saving for my next trip to New Orleans. I really want to go down for Mardi Gras 2006. They're going to have it, and I want to be there to celebrate the rebirth of the most beautiful city on earth.

- My cat Shakespeare misses me and is having separation anxiety issues. Our other girl India is pretty much upset because two nights a week she has to wait a few extra hours for her dinner. She weighs 20 pounds and is only 3 years old. She's a big baby.

- I'm waiting to hear back from a local music store about jazz funeral musicians for my book event. Cross your fingers that Jason finds some people for it!

- It seems some magazine subscribers mags have either gotten lost in the mail or were accidentally overlooked. Unfortunately, since I'm the only one running and working the show, this has happened. Fortunately, my subscribers are the nicest people on the planet and understand. You guys rule.

- I wish everyone from out of town could make it to the party this weekend. You guys are always with me in spirit, though.

- Say a prayer for my grandma, please. She's going in for a test tomorrow. Send some good energy her way.

- To read the QC Times article from yesterday, click here = http://www.qctimes.net/articles/2005/10/16/features/arts_leisure/doc4351c440a5949802502773.txt

- TheCemeteryClub.com has surpassed the 6,000 mark. Hooray!!!

Well, that's it for me tonight if I want to go to bed kind of on time. First I need to do laundry, which I forgot again until just now. Got to wash my Spirit Halloween shirt for tomorrow night! Work work work! If you're in the area, stop in and say hi.

G'night
Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2005-10-09T17:24:00.000-07:00

Spirit Halloween Superstore, how may I help you?

If you call the Davenport Spirit Halloween store, you will hear that on the other end of the line--and you might just be talking to me! Yep, I got a part-time job at the local Halloween shop. And it's not just any run of the mill spooky store--it is the area's craziest and biggest Halloween store! For a part-time job, it's pretty sweet. I mean, I am the cemetery grrrl after all.

It all started when I was kicking around the idea of getting a part-time job for the holiday season. With the ridiculous gas prices (which are completely uncalled for and unnecessary, thank you, Mr. Bush and evil corporate cronies), a new car and the holidays coming up, times are tight. On top of that, I've got a book and magazine to promote! That takes time and money, my friends. I've got to save money up for the book tour, you know. A self publisher is far from rich! (at least for now ;-)

So I happen upon the listing for the Spirit store. How perfect! It's only through Nov. 1, and it's HALLOWEEN! Perfect. This way I can decide if part-time on top of full-time on top of book and magazine will work for me, and it's only for a month. And it's HALLOWEEN! And I love it. What a sweet job! I get to be in a huge store chock full of Halloween craziness. It's perfect! I get to help people, who are mostly very nice. And I also get to fully appreciate the proper upbringing I got from my parents. Because, let me tell you, there are some kids who are obnoxious. But worse than that is the fact that THEIR PARENTS are worse than they are! First of all, the kids act like they were raised by psychotic wolves (because I honestly think wolves could have done a much better job of raising decent kids). Tossing things around. Putting mask after mask on. Tossing them aside. Licking them.

Important aside: I highly recommend to my intelligent readers that you DO NOT ever buy a mask at a store unless you have the intent of Lysoling the hell out of it once you get that sucker home. You can't imagine how many people try those things on EVERY DAY. Cootie central. Better yet, go to www.spirithalloweenstore.com and order one off of the site. A brand new one. It will be worth it.

Back to the losers that come into the store. While I don't mind straightening up--because things just get messy--there is a big difference between normal messiness and people who are just a**holes. You know what I'm talking about. And don't get me started about the people lifting costumes or other items. Yes, the costumes and such can be pretty pricey. But that's life. And if you are stealing items, you're making the prices shoot up that much higher. It's like our gas prices ... thieves are in charge of the oil, and it is the thieves that price the gas ridiculously high. Long story short: don't steal, freaks!

But aside from the random idiots of the area, work at the Halloween store is sweet. And they pay me to do it! I get to help people find wacky items. People are usually in a good mood, as they're looking for costumes and props and stuff for an upcoming good time.

Another word to the wise. No matter where you go, it's pretty much the given rule that if it's a Halloween item, there are no returns. That's just the way of the holiday world. People are all about returning something they wore to a party "but didn't get dirty." Not everyone, mind you, but enough to make this rule a rule. We're not the only store that does this by a long shot.

Anyway, though my feet are tired (three day in a row of long shifts on my feet, and I'm a sore footed wuss! Desk jobs will kill ya!), it was a fun day. Right as we were closing, I got a call from a woman who wanted a costume in a plus size. I went over and found a couple for her and described them. What do they come with? How big are they? I tell her and tell her the size suggestions, etc. Can you take them out and see how big they really are? Will they fill a person of such and such size? I was on the phone a good 10 minutes with her. I thought she was going to have me try it on to see if it would fit HER! Geez, lady, I don't know what you even look like! She was very nice, though, and appreciated the help I gave her. No problem. I'm here to help.

Well, I'm also here to see my beloved husband, who is dozing on the couch. His band played for a kids Halloween program today. With my new evening and weekend schedule at Spirit and his evening and day hours and Saturday hours at the museum, we don't see each other nearly as much as we're used to. We miss each other! So I'm going to snuggle up with him and watch a scary movie and drink some hot cocoa. Sounds like a perfect night to me.

Cheers!
Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

Check out the new book! It's on the site!

2005-09-29T19:16:00.000-07:00

The magazine and the book are done!!!

At long last the wait is over. "Epitaphs Magazine" was available for the first time this past Saturday (during the Oakdale Memorial Gardens' Forget-Me-Not event), and my book "Cemetery Walk" is now for sale online! What a week!

And now, in order to supplement the selling and buying of books and such, I have taken on a new thing--a part-time job! I am now the newest employee of the Spirit Halloween Store! I'll be working there through the end of October. I'm looking forward to it. Me and Halloween? What a match!

So much to share, but Bill just got home from work (he had to work at the museum until 9 p.m.). Need to spend time with my hubby!

Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2005-09-06T14:01:00.000-07:00

Links About Our Current Times

In Exile - NOLA
by Abram Himelstein, who ran The Neighborhood Story Project in New Orleans until forced to flee by Hurricane Katrina. He's staying with family in Houston, trying to piece his life together and find the children he once taught to write. He'll blog his experiences here. (Incredibly well-written and thought-provoking. Start reading from the bottom up to go in order.)
http://blogs.chron.com/exile/

"Katrina's Real Name: Global Warming:
MotherJones.com
http://www.motherjones.com/commentary/columns/2005/08/katrina.html

2005-09-06T04:36:00.000-07:00

Knowing what it means to miss New Orleans

My husband and I never lived in New Orleans, but we have discussed the possibility many times. If it weren't for the heat much of the year, we just might have made the move to NOLA. There is something about the city that gets inside your skin. Its beauty, its complex history, its mix of people. When we visited in the summer for our first wedding anniversary, you couldn't walk down to a new street corner without hearing "Summertime."

Before Katrina, I missed New Orleans every day. I have postcards of her in my cubicle at work. I decorated our bedroom with Mardi Gras masks, framed vintage postcards and a vintage decorative plate. There's an old map of the Quarter framed in our kitchen as well as a collage frame of pictures of Bill and I from that anniversary trip. Before Katrina, there were already reminders of the city that stole my heart. Now I wonder, as we all do, when that city will return.

As of late last night, I heard from the last acquaintance of mine from the area. Rob and his family are okay. The Priestess and her partner are okay. Deb and her family are okay, Ericka and Ryan are okay. I am so very relieved. My heart still aches for those who have been lost, though. How can it not? How can any of us not feel the loss of so many?

Last December, when Bill and my parents and I visited NOLA, I met Priestess Miriam. As a tour group shuffled through the store and back room of the Voodoo Spiritual Temple, she said, "Come on in, everyone. After the tsunami and all the lives we have lost, let's see how many we have left. Come on in." I was touched by what she said then. I had no idea how fitting her words would become.

As you may know, for those of you on my e-mail list, I am dedicating the second issue of "Epitaphs Magazine" to the cemeteries of New Orleans. I would also like to open this up to the all the cemeteries of the South that were affected by Katrina. There is already talk of how people are concerned about the fate of these historic cemeteries. The concern is always prefaced by the expression of wanting to help the living first, though the cemetery concern is always underlying. Of course, it is. It is nothing to be ashamed of. We have all come together because of our love for cemeteries and the history inside them. It is a given that the living come first. Not a one of you has to worry about anyone thinking you are only thinking of the dead. I have seen more heart in these groups than I have time to share right now before I head to work. We may be cemetery lovers, but first and foremost, we love them because we celebrate life.

My heart goes out to everyone affected by the hurricane, and I wish you the best. If there is anything your fellow Americans and cemetery lovers can do, all you need to do is ask.

All the best,
Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2005-08-31T19:35:00.000-07:00

Hurricane Katrina and dear New Orleans

Working on "Cemetery Walk" led me to meet many wonderful people. Some of these people are from New Orleans and the surrounding area. I am so worried about all of them and their family and other loved ones.

I did look up author Deborah LeBlanc's Web site (www.deborahleblanc.com) and checked her blog. She is okay. She was in New York when it happened. Her family, though, was in Lafayette. They are all fine, and she has been driving and driving endless hours to get to them before continuing her book tour. Thank goodness you are all right, Deb.

Ericka and Ryan, who I know through the Grave-L Yahoo group also checked in with the list. They are in Baton Rouge and are okay. They finally got power back. Ryan's parents are with them. They live in New Orleans. Ericka says they will be allowed in NOLA Monday to gather their belongings and see what is left of their home. Then they won't be allowed back in for a month. I can't imagine. I just can't imagine.

I am still praying that Rob Florence and his family are safe as well as Priestess Miriam and her family.

To all of you in the South who have been affected by this devastation, my thoughts and prayers are with you. I wish I could make this better.

Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2005-08-28T06:54:00.000-07:00

From "Endeca"

Dr. Avery wasn't able to come see me again today. That is just fine by me. It's quite wonderful really. Because Dr. Hamilton came in his stead. Dr. Hamilton is quite lovely, as I belive I've told you before, Diary. While he is much older than me, there is nothing wrong in that. After all, Mother married Father, and he is twenty years her senior! Dr. Hamilton is so young compared to Dr. Avery, who is quite ancient, that I can't imagine he is more than ten years older than me. Regardless, he is handsome and kind and gentle. He is everything I can imagine in a husband.

What am I going on about? How foolish of me to think that this man could ever be interested in a cripple such as me. Mother tells me not to refer to myself as a cripple, but I know that it is only because people in fine society do not have cripples as relations. But what else can I be called? Thadius (that is my handsome doctor's name!) never treats me like I am crippled or defective. To be honest, he treats me as a friend. He is the only one of my regular visitors who does. He talks to me about how he enjoys riding, even though Mary is not so fond of it (I can only assume Mary is his sister). He also shows me pictures he's drawn. He told me today, "You know, Miss Emily, you are the only one I've ever shown my drawing book to. Mary thinks such things are frivolous and that I should only concentrate my energies on my doctoring, as she calls it. So you and I have a secret."

I told him it is a secret I appreciate very much and that I didn't think it was frivolous at all. In fact, I think it is imperative that he keep drawing. His sketches of landscapes I've never seen and probably will never bring the world to me. That's just what he told me once. "If Miss Emily can't come to the world, the world shall come to Miss Emily." He has even given me some of his drawings. I treasure them so! Oh, Diary, I do so love him!

2005-08-19T13:17:00.000-07:00

I have my paper topic!!!

I have figured out my paper topic for the Museum of Funeral Customs symposium. Hooray! While sitting in a meeting going over things we have gone over many many times, I took notes for other work stuff as well as thoughts I was having about what I would be interested in writing about. I had been stuck on post-mortem photography since I first learned about the proposal submission. It's a fascinating topic, but I wasn't sure which angle would be the best. And all resulted in "ack!"

Then it struck me. Like a little brick! What have I been obsessed with for the many years of my life? What did I focus much of my studies on in college (and as much as I could get away on in high school in the land of HIS-story)? Women's studies! So, when I started jotting down ideas and "Women's Roles in Mourning" came out, it was a big TA-DA! As my mother often says, "Oompriaco!" How that is really spelled, I do not know. But as my paper is not about "Oompriaco," I dont' care.

So "Women's Roles in Mourning" it is. I am so excited! It's so me! And I am on it, to quote my good friend Katie.

Now for other plans ...

Halloween. Friends, it is only a couple of months away. Do you know what you're going to be for the big day? Katie is planning on being Carrie, of Stephen King fame. What a great costume! But what about me? I have two main choices at this point: a murderous socialite (ish) or a suicidal writer. No, I'm not going to be any Sharon Stone character or Sylvia Plath. I may get a little down sometimes, but I'm not that depressed! My choices are currently: Lizzie Borden or Dorothy Parker. So post-Victorian with axe accesory or roaring 20s flapper writer with poisonous pen. Either way, I just can't lose!

***

Considering that I have the decision made on the paper topic, that's one major project goal decided. Now to go forth and figure out the book conundrum. Loving that word this week. Conundrum, hooray! Fiction novel? Non-fiction cemetery part deux/dos/etc.? Some other non-fiction? Children's book called "Abracadaver: Embalming is Fun!" Now that's just silly. I don't really know enough about embalming to write a book on it. Good times, nonetheless!

Goddess gracious, thank Goddess it's Friday! I am so excited that the weekend is just about here (50 minutes away and counting). It's been a long one. I'm tired, I've got a lot going on, my brain is jumbled, my house is a mess (and no elves have come in to straighten it up) and I just want to go see a movie! My husband's schedule this weekend is crazy (and has been crazy and will continue to be crazy), so it's often just a kiss and run, hi/bye/see ya time with him. Bill! I miss you! The cats miss their dad! :-) Once things calm down, it will all be good. Sunday we're planning to take a road trip. It will be lovely.

For anyone who is in the area, remember that the Forget-Me-Not: Victorian Day at Oakdale Memorial Gardens event will take place Saturday, Sept. 24, from 1-5 p.m. Be there or be in a toe-pincher.

Enjoy the weekend, me hardies! Arrrrhhhh!!!!!!

Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2005-08-18T19:44:00.000-07:00

Happiness is a co-dependent cat.

At least she thinks it is. Shakespeare, my 6 1/2-year-old calico/tortoise shell girl loves me very much. She also owns me and wants to be on my lap at all times when I am home. I love that about her but also wish she didn't feel so adamant about being on my lap every time I get on this computer. It's not even so bad when I'm using my laptop because I can manuever her better. But on our iMac online, it's a lot more difficult to balance her and type easily. And typing is supposed to be easy! The cat is a brat.

The reason for the posting is not really about the cat, though. It's about crossroads. I feel I'm at a crossroads. Again. Any time I'm between projects I feel this way. Now those of you who know me (TC, Todd, Kristin, Kelly, Timmo, etc.) know that my version of "between projects" is different than other people's idea of it. I have tons of stuff going on, but nothing that is soul-consuming. I like soul-consuming. It keeps my mind off of other issues.

I'm wondering what to do next regarding my next book. Fiction or non-fiction? What should I write for my symposium proposal? All this stuff.

More later...

2005-08-18T19:32:00.000-07:00

From "Endeca"

She dreams of him behind violet eyelids. He pulse quickens inside blue veins. Everything is in color. The well is red. The swing she is on is white. On her feet are black shoes. She feels his hands pushing at her lower back each time her pendulum of motion takes her to him. She comes to him, he pushes her away with the knowledge that she will always come back.

In her dream, she closes her eyes, enhancing the sensation of falling and flying as the swing carries her up up up then back back back. Will she dream inside her dream? Will she fly as she falls?

Wake up next morning, she tells herself. No, wake up a hundred mornings from now. Tomorrow is too soon. The spell is cast; don't break it. Fill the sleeping mind with dreams and leave the days of being propped up like a ragdoll behind. There must be more in store for her than a lifeless childhood. There must be love, there must be meaning. I know he loves me, she think. I know he must. He must.

Sunlight cracks in through the same eyelids that closed it out. Fight it. Don't let it win! Wake up and you'll be nothing again. A burden.

"I believe in ghosts. I believe in ghosts. I believe in the dead. I believe in the dead."

Her mantra repeat as the clank of dishes from the kitchen below pulls her even further out of her sleep.

2005-08-15T21:19:00.000-07:00

We have surpassed 5,000 visitors!

Woooo hoooo! TheCemeteryClub.com has had more than 5,000 visitors! Finally! The site is somebody!!!!

So cool. So awesome. Now if only it would hit that number daily when my book comes out ... and at least half of them buy the book at that time.

I haven't posted for a while. My day job just celebrated homecoming. Major big deal. Wacky time. Crazy hours. My husband was on the team that opened the new museum in town the weekend before. Craaa-zy times for him. But super cool museum.

I do have a topic for tonight before I go to bed. I am dag tired, for sure. Friendship. Friendship is a strange thing. It seems like it would be easy, but it's really not. I guess all things worth having are worth working for. For instance, I've been a slacker girl when it comes to a number of my friends. If I don't get regular e-mail from them, it's as if my brain forgets they are around. Suddenly months have passed and I'm super lame-o friend! Gosh, today I didn't even get home to see my lovely husband until nearly 10 p.m. Why? Because I was hanging out in the American Legion with my new friend (and many of my own family members). This new friend knew my grandpa many moons ago when Grandpa was in Buddies of the Airlanes. It was a fun night, but then I get home and my husband is already in bed. I feel a bit like a schmuck.

Ah, friendship. Friendship and the meaning of it change as we get older. Even as kids the boy/girl dichotomy can get in the way. Girls play with this, boys with that. As we get older and marriage starts setting in, a whole bunch of other issues can kick in. Jealousy. Misunderstandings. Best of intentions. Men/women issues. That stinks. I really do not like the whole idea that "men and women can't be friends without the sex part getting in the way" ("When Harry Met Sally ..."). That is one of my favorite movies ever, but I just don't agree with that line. Even if two friends are attracted to each other (which they are at least mentally), the "sex thing" isn't necessarily even a "sex thing." It can merely be, "Hey, there's my friend Keanu Reeves. He's my best friend and he's really hot." Doesn't have to mean there is a physical relationship going on or building or even a potential. Just because Keanu is a beautiful human doesn't mean he's going to sleep with everyone. And if he were to do such a thing, that wouldn't mean that male/female friendship is bad; it would just mean he's a bit of a 'ho. (Sorry, Keanu! I mean nothing by it! Just an example!)

So here's the deal. I've had some interesting friendships with men. Let's start with gradeschool and the boys. A couple of my recess friends were boys. One, who I'll call Jack, was a sweet kid and kind of cute in a bit of a dorky way. He had horned-rimmed glasses, freckles, wasn't too tall. But he was funny and nice. I used to play with him and his other friend at recess. I had a little crush on him, but it never got in the way of our recess time.

Fast forward to high school (as junior high sucked). I was really good friends with a guy I will call Sam. Sam and I did everything together. Total buds. We both eventually seemed to like each other as more than friends after a long while. I thought, wow! I'm going to finally have a boyfriend! Weird, but cool! No. Right after this near-revelation, he started dating MY BEST FRIEND. This was just wonderful. Then, when they started having troubles, each of them started calling me to cry on my shoulder. I was way over that before it began. I learned later that he may have liked me, but this "friend" "put out." Lovely.

Second major high school crush. We'll call him Aubry (because we can). Thought he was the bee's knees. Again, glasses, freckles (hmm, a trend?), kinda pale, slightly tall but not really. Incredibly dry sense of humor. I thought he was awesome. Very smart and witty. My friend (the same #)$(#(@## that dated my old best friend, told that best friend that I had a crush on Aubry, who he was friends with. I walked into English class the next day, Aubry said hi to me--and the way he said "hi" (that one little word) told me that he knew. I said hi back really quickly and sat down without another word. I totally missed my window. We were still friends but it was weird. Especially when he started dating this other chick from out of nowhere and sported remarkably large hickeys on his neck. Very proud of them. Ick. Totally gross. Another friendship made lame.

Still in high school, I had a very good friend who adored me. We did everything together. I know he cared about me very much. But he eventually got too mixed up in a number of things to vast to go into here. Plus, I think he's at least a little big gay.

And speaking of gay friends! A number of years ago I had a friend who did lots with me. We were good buddies. He was gay as gay can be. I was not. I was single at the time and getting teased by yet another guy (who I'm pretty sure is gay and deep in the closet). This friend started saying things like, "I could get you to do anything I want. I bet you I could." What he meant was, like the "addition" to fortune cookies "... in bed." Whatever! Hello! Gay! Me woman! You man!" Lordy.

So you see, friendship can be like walking on egg shells ... or burning coals. It can also be very great. Ah, we humans can make things so very difficult.

Anyway, frienship is wonderful. I treasure my friends like, well, treasure! But there can be outside factors that change the perception of two friends. Some good, so bad. But as Wes our workstudy says, "It is what it is. It will be what it will be." Thanks, Wes. You are a man smarter then you know.

Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2005-08-01T15:24:00.000-07:00

Query letter ready to go

Okay, everyone. I just finished a query letter to a literary agent in Wisconsin that I met during the Writers' Institute conference I attended a week and a half ago. I'm putting it in the mail tomorrow. She was very interested in the idea for a second cemetery-themed book I pitched to her. If she continues to like it, I just may end up with an agent and that much closer to a book published by a full-fledged publisher! Not that self-publishing isn't dandy, but I'd be getting paid a lot easier then having to peddle the book all on my own like I have to do now.

Hope of hopes!
Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2005-07-30T17:13:00.000-07:00

Beading for a Book Tour

For about the last month or so I've retaken up my jewelry habit in order to help fund my upcoming book tour. As some of you may know, I sell sterling silver charm bracelets, necklaces and such through www.TheCemeteryClub.com. Well, I also hand-craft other beaded jewelry, and my friend Tracey is encouraging me to do so by joining her at farmers' markets and other crafty events.

Today was my second day out with her. I followed Tracey and her sister-in-law, Janet, to Sherrard, Illinois. Sherrard is a village of 700 (that's what the population sign says). Nice little town (VERY little) with nice people. But not many were in the mood to buy jewelry. Tracey sells gorgeous beaded bracelets (which you can see and buy at www.andthebeadgoesonjewelry.com). Both of us (and sis Janet) make lovely things, but we ended up selling less than $100 total (together) after SEVEN hours. Yikes. Fortunately, unlike the day we did the farmers' market in Moline a couple Saturdays ago, it was a nice day. Two weeks ago it was about 100 degrees and humid with a heat index of 4,000. I only made a whopping $33 that day.

The kooky thing is that even though I've spent many evenings beading and creating, the things that I have sold the most of have been the sterling silver rings. Which I only buy wholesale and do nothing else with. I don't bead them or make them extra pretty. I just take them out of their bag and put them on the table. I sold all but two of my stock today. SO WHAT THE HECK AM I WASTING MY TIME BEADING LIKE A CRAZY WOMAN FOR? Well, at least something sold. I like what I make. I have a lot of Halloween-themed items because I like spooky stuff (big surprise) so I imagine that come fall, those things will sell like hot cakes.

If anyone has any tips on how to do better at these crafty shows, please let me know. Tracey and Janet and I will be at the Moline farmers' market next Saturday if any of you want to check out our stuff.

The good thing about today was that I spent it in good company outside in the shade (very important) and was able to make more jewelry for the next time. So I'm set until next week, when I'm sure people will be clamoring to buy my stuff!

For those of you wondering why this woman--who is writing books, publishing magazines, updating a Web site, helping organize a cemetery event and who knows what else--is spending time making and selling jewelry, the answer is simple. Money. In order to go on my book tour this month, I need to have some money on stand-by. Since I am self-publishing, it's up to ME to make this book sell. So while I was selling a ring here and there today, I was marketing my book. I had bookmarks out for people and encouraged them to visit my site. "Look for me in local bookstores! I'll be doing signings!" You gotta work it when you can. I was also recruiting volunteers for the cemetery event at Oakdale. If there's one thing I've found about doing my own thing (regarding writing, giving classes, etc.) it's that you have to always be marketing yourself. And you must do it in an honest and down-to-earth way. Reach out to people. Connect with them. That's what my book is about really. People connecting with other people--whether those people are dead or alive.

Well, I've got to check into some gravestone rubbing kits I want to sell during the cemetery event at Oakdale.

Keep on keepin' on,
Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2005-07-27T21:14:00.000-07:00

Epitaphs Magazine has gone global!

Yes, friends, we have hit the big time. Within the past few months, the little magazine that is about to be published went international. Not only do we have subscribers from all over the U.S., we also have subscribers in England, Canada and now France! How exciting!

Spreading the good word about cemeteries,

Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2005-07-23T15:12:00.000-07:00

Writers' Institute Rocks!

Today I have returned from my trip to Madison,Wisconsin and the Writers' Institute refreshed, renewed and excited. Anything seems possible now! Actually, anything IS possible. And it was before my trip. This conference and the people I met proved to me for certain that I am on the right track. I felt it already, but it is so nice to have such positive reinforcement.

I met some fabulous people at the conference. If Linda, Paul, Carleen or Pam happen upon this blog, it was such a pleasure to meet all of you! You'll be hearing from me!

For anyone, especially those in the Midwest, who are looking for a writing conference to attend and have no idea how to go about it, I highly recommend the Writers' Institute at the University of Wisconsin-Madison. It's a great town, a great facility and phenomenal speakers and instructors. The participants are also wonderful. Everyone is incredibly supportive and friendly. There's no snobbery, which is something I was worried about before I attended last year. I admit it, artists are weird. Writers can be quite weird. Writing is a solitary endeavor, and to take yourself away from your cocoon of writing and then wander into the world outside that cocoon can be daunting. I've known some people who think they're the bee's knees and won't give a fellow writer the time of day ... unless they feel there's something for them to gain by it. But that's not why most writers write. We write to connect with people. Being snobby and thinking you're the awesomest of the awesomest awesome is lame. To those people I say, "Come back to this planet and don't be so uptight." There is plenty of room for more awesome people. Besides, some of the folks who think they are better than chocolate can really be sucky writers. We're all learning endlessly. It's a beautiful thing.

So in a nut shell, this is a fab conference. This was the first time I've ever talked to agents. And it was not even scary!

I have so much I could talk about from this weekend, but I have to unpack and also get ready for the Avril Lavigne concert tonight. I'm going with my friends Leita and Deanna (Leita is 10, and Deanna is her mom and wife of one of my bestest friends). I just talked to Tim, and he said Leita is all excited and has her eye makeup on. It's going to be a blast.

Have a great weekend, everybody!

Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2005-07-18T20:14:00.000-07:00

Ahoy! The galley has arrived!

It's Monday, July 18, 2005, and I finally received the first galley for my book. It's exciting and daunting. This is one of the last times I'll look at the book before it goes to the printer. That means it's sooooo close to its final form. But it also means close scrutiny over the pages. Lots of things to check over and verify. Fine-tooth comb time.

Being a published author is NOT for sissies.

Back to the proofing ...

Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2005-07-17T08:10:00.000-07:00

Makin' Jewelry

It's Sunday on a hot, steamy, ack weekend. It is an "ack" weekend because it IS so hot. I'm not a heat person. I prefer fall with its lovely falling leaves smell and cool breezes. I like jeans and sweaters. Even on the hottest days I prefer my capri jeans to a pair of shorts. Shorts tend to ride up, and that is not cool at all. Give me a nice crisp fall day, and I'm happy.

So, needless to say, this ridiculous 95-degree plus weather (complete with dangerous draught) is not my cup of tea. And I like tea! I enjoy heating up a kettle full of water to make myself some darjeeling with honey and cream. I've noticed that extreme heart makes people cranky. Can't blame them. Who wants to sweat in places they don't normally sweat?

Speaking of sweat, during 95-degree weather with blazing sun, I went to the local Farmer's Market and set up shop with my pal Tracey. She had told me I could share a booth with her to sell my jewelry. She sells jewelry, too. But her's is different. She's all about colorful beads and such, and I'm all about the sterling silver charms. More people showed up than I thought would, but we didn't sell a ton of stuff. But a few bucks is a few bucks--especially since this money is going toward my upcoming book tour.

So I spent this morning taking photos of the jewely I didn't sell so I can post it on eBay. I've got some cool stuff, if I do say so myself. An adorable Harry Potter-themed charm bracelet, gardener's bracelets, memories of grandmother, and more. The are in sterling silver. I also have sterling silver necklaces (22 inches, also in sterling silver), including a pirate ("Pirates of the Caribbean" or "Goonies"), Grandmother, a little ghost, a ribbon (like the popular ribbons seen on cars), a slot machine (for Las Vegas and riverboat gambling fans!), and much more.

I hope to have things posted soon. Right now I have a "Pirates of the Caribbean" themed pin posted. Look up user name "elfaba1" if you are interested.

Well, while I should be posting eBay items or editing the magazine, I think I need a nap more so thatn the other two things. Long weekend so far, and I really want to see "Charlie and the Chocolte Factory" and "Dark Water."

But now, since I've put in hours of work on my projects already this weekend, I need a little cat nap.

Hope all is well around the world with you!

Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2005-06-29T13:47:00.000-07:00

Mom and the Book

I am happy to say that my mother is doing much better now. The doctor's office is still on my bad list, though. One of my biggest pet peeves is lack of information or communication. Mom was on the wrong end of both regarding her poor heart and blood pressure. I won't get into it, but I have to say that a certain nurse practitioner needs to start treating the patients she sees with care and consideration. Enough said about that. For now.

THE BOOK!

Wonderful news! I had a three-way call meeting with my publishing company rep and book designer, and all is going swimmingly! I should have my first galley in two weeks. I'm so excited! The book is still on schedule for the fall release. I can't wait to see it all put together.

THE SITE

I just made some edits and updates to TheCemeteryClub.com. The PayPal links finally work (hurray!) and can be used to pay for Epitaphs magazine subscriptions, single issues and ads.

I've also recently added a genealogy page with the start of a link section I will be continuing to build.

The writing tips section now how photography tips. I intend to make the is a good resource page for prospective contributors to the magazine ... and also people who just want to learn how to improve their writing and photography skills. If you're like me, you never want to stop learning.

Well, that's the news for now. Stop by the site soon. We've had more than 4,000 visitors, which is major for us. I can't wait for the day when we get 4,000 hits a day! Here's to the future!

Cheers!
Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2005-06-23T12:35:00.000-07:00

I find myself talking or e-mailing about my mom as if I'm writing about someone I vaguely know. It's not because I feel like I don't know her or am not close to her. I am very close to my mother. But when I tell someone that my mother almost had a heart attack this week, it's like I'm talking about a stranger. I think my mind is trying to protect me from breaking down; I am saying "my mother" as if it was coming out "some person I don't know." The emotion is not there.

Perhaps my mind is telling me not to grieve for what isn't gone. Maybe I'm growing up and am being responsible and "strong." Maybe I'm denying it's happening. I feel helpless. What can I do? Can I take her heart in my hand and soothe it? Can I trade it with mine and give hers a rest? I know I cannot. But I want to. I want to do whatever will make her better. She means too much to too many people for this to be happening.

A friend of mine asked me to look after her younger sister in a way the other day. That isn't how she put it, but I know what she means. Her sister is my friend, too, I just haven't known her as long. She's a very cool person. The thing is that while my whole agenda in the world is to make everything in the world better, I know I can't do it all on my own. When a co-worker's parent is sick, I'm the first to run out and buy a card or little trinket to cheer her up. I guess I'm what you could call an "empath." I feel how a person would feel. I get a tinge of the pain, confusion and grief. I want to help. I want to put a bandaid on the world. But since my husband had a serious health scare and now that my mom is in the middle of one, I see clearly how I can only focus myself on them. I understand it now.

World, I love you. I know you are in dire need of being saved. Big bad horrible people are trying to smother you with greed, self-righteousness and my-god-is-better/bigger/awesomer-than-your-god attitudes. You know I will help you as much as I can. Right now my family needs me. I know you understand.

-Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2005-06-23T07:38:00.000-07:00

TheCemeteryClub.com blog is now available for RSS!

It's Thursday, June 22, the second day of summer of 2005.

I just attended an awesome Writing for the Web seminar in Chicago led by Shel Holtz. Very awesome indeed. I also learned about RSS, which allows people to get updates on my blog automatically. I don't know enough to explain it myself yet, so go to Wikipedia.com and punch in RSS to learn more. It's a great concept, though. You should also go to NewsGator.com or the like and sign up for a free account. It's way cool once you get into it.

I've been sick for the past few days. Not fun when you are in a seminar--especially when the seminar is actually good (some suck) and you don't want to miss anything. I'm feeling better now. But I did find out that my mother was very close to having a heart attack this weekend. She is still not in the clear yet but is doing better. It's really hard to get my mind around it. For the first time I actually had this thought run through my mind: what if something happened to my mother while I was gone/not near/not in the same room? What if my mother had a heart attack and died? How could something like that happen? How could it be allowed?

It, of course, didn't. But yesterday was the first time I ever thought of my mother as anything but eternal. I came to the realization that when your parent dies, you are no longer a kid anymore. If something had happened to my mother, I would have had to grow up really fast. And I'm 32. I am grown up. But no matter how old you are, you are always somebody's baby. My grandmother is sick with worry about her 54-year-old baby. When her mother died (at the age of 98), Grandma was Granny's baby. Her oldest baby, and she was in her seventies.

Oh, the irony of the one who writes about cemeteries and death being afraid of death and losing the ones she loves.

-Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2005-06-06T19:28:00.000-07:00

Apologies to all those I haven't talked to in ages ...

It's 6-6-05

It's June. It's Monday. It's two weeks after I thought the book would be done. I have been working nearly non-stop on it during my spare time (what's that?). I did get in two whole bike rides with my husband since he bought us new bikes. With the recent health scares, he is very serious about getting healthy. I'm very proud of him. And he's getting me to get my butt in gear.

Dare I say the book will go to the publisher tomorrow? I've had some setbacks. I'm over them now. One setback is actually a blessing. It has taken some of the stress away and has made me simplify things. I am limited on photos. This is actually not a bad thing. And I could go crazy with pics if I wanted to. For $2.50 a pop! No thank you. Keep in mind, I am self-publishing. I'm not concerned, though. I've got it figured out. Plus, I've got a magazine coming out, and I'm sure I've got plenty more books in me. No worries here.

Before I finish (maybe) the book tonight (maybe), I need to tend to ShangChi the betta fish. His tank ammonia levels are quite high. Just say NO to fin rot!!!! We will not have another death in the family! I'll post pics of him soon ... and also of Sheila, the African dwarf frog. She is spotted green and very tiny. She is not huge like Ghost the African albino clawed frog who is taking over the world. He is going to be upgraded to a 5-gallon tank soon. He's huge! I'd like to get a goldfish to be his tankmate, but unless I get a fish the size of Toledo, Ghost would most likely eat him. Again, no more deaths in the family.

Before I sign off, sorry to all I've been ignoring. I'm really not ignoring you in my mind. I'm thinking of all of you (including Toni, Kelly, Linn, TC, Kristin, Mom and Dad, Grandma, cousins, aunts, uncles ...). I've promised myself to get the book done straight away. It's time. I know all of you understand. At least the ones who know about my timeline as of late. To the rest of you, sorry!!! I will call, e-mail, etc., soon!

Love to you all and good night.

Minda

p.s.
We're starting to get more and more "Epitaphs" subscriptions coming in. How exciting!

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

Simon-LeFish

2005-06-02T15:11:00.001-07:00

Simon-LeFish
Originally uploaded by cemeterychick.

May he rest in peace in calm waters.

Simon-LeBon-pretty-boy

2005-06-02T15:11:00.000-07:00

Simon-LeBon-pretty-boy
Originally uploaded by cemeterychick.

This is a pic of my beautiful Simon.

ghost-the-flash

2005-05-20T12:04:00.001-07:00

ghost-the-flash
Originally uploaded by cemeterychick.

Faster than a speeding albino frog!

Ghost-by-rock

2005-05-20T12:04:00.000-07:00

Ghost-by-rock
Originally uploaded by cemeterychick.

Blurry Ghost.

Ghost-at-top

2005-05-20T12:03:00.000-07:00

Ghost-at-top
Originally uploaded by cemeterychick.

Here's Ghost hanging out.

2005-05-20T11:33:00.000-07:00

The Life Aquatic

It's Friday, May 20 ...

About two weeks ago I purchased a new member of the family ... from Walmart. He is an albino clawed foot frog--his name is Ghost. He's pretty cool, though my colleague next to me at the office thinks he's a protozoa. Every time Keith comes over, Ghost seems to be "shut down." While he can be quite the active frog, most of the time he's just floating or just "there" at the bottom of the gallon tank.

To tell the truth, Ghost can be a bit of a spaz. But, as Keith points out, he's a delayed reaction spaz. It might take him a moment or five before he realizes he should be freaking out if I move my hand too close to the tank to turn on or off his light. Regardless, Ghost has brought an element of enjoyment and scientific interest to members of my department.

We wonder many things about him, such as:

How big will he get? (He's currently 1/2" wide, 2" tall/1.2" butt to nose. But Kristy says he will probably get huge.)

Since he has weird red eyes, does that mean he's blind? (We don't know if he's blind or just kinda stupid.)

Will he escape? (Peeps on the internet say that these frogs are escape artists and must not have any form of escape hatch or hole.)

All in all, Ghost is a pretty entertaining guy. Here are a couple of pics of the frogmeister. My favorite is the one where I caught him in full swimming action ... and he looks like a flash of peach color! Super cool!

Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2005-05-16T19:58:00.000-07:00

The new promo postcard for "Cemetery Walk"!

2005-05-16T19:06:00.000-07:00

Hangin' in the ER

It's Monday, May 16, 2005 ...

2005 is turning out to be a banner year for the Powers-Douglas clan of two (plus 2 cats, a fish and a frog). Last week my husband started getting a weird pressure/pain sensation in his chest and tingling in his left arm, and it was off to the ER we went. Fortunately he was not having a heart attack or anything like that. What is going on, we don't know yet. They did a bunch of tests that day, and the next day he had to go in for a stress test. Then the weekend hit, and there we were. Waiting for something to happen and hoping it wouldn't. But since we'd just had a scare of major yikes, we didn't travel out of town for our friend's graduation as planned (sorry, Toni). We actually didn't do too much. We didn't even go to the movies as I had wanted to do. It was sit back and try to relax time. But then Monday came (today), and our family doctor hasn't even received anything from the hospital yet. We still know nothing. Accept that we're getting stressed because we don't know anything.

So the weekend was an odd one. The one thing I had really wanted to do was go to the movies. I used to go to the movies at least once a week. When I was in high school there were even times when I saw three movies in the theater in one day. I'm not joking! THREE! I was a rabid movie fiend. Now I'm lucky if I see three movies in 6 months. It stinks! And there were at least three movies I really want to see out. "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy," "Unleashed" and "Crash." I'm holding out for a weeknight this week. We'll see how that works. I need some time to get absorbed into something on a really large screen that can dwarf everything else running through my mind. Time to decompress.

Now for the good news ...

THE BOOK CHAPTERS ARE DONE!!!!!! THE INTRODUCTION IS DONE!!!!!!!

The end of the writing process for "Cemetery Walk" is almost completely done! The book is with my editor/proofers. I'm finishing the last details as well as the photo selection and cutlines. Ahh, it's such a good thing. It will go to the publisher at the end of this month. To quote young Anakin Skywalk in "Phantom Menace," I say, "Yippeeee!"

MAGAZINE UPDATE

All is well on the "Epitaphs" front. I'm doing stuff here and there, and will hit it full steam when the book is out of my hands. Ad space is selling well. Submissions are great. Keep them both coming! The magazine is going to rock!!!

BOOK PROMO STUFF

I put in extra hours on book promotion stuff tonight and didn't end up seeing my husband until 7:30 p.m., which he was not thrilled about. I thought he was just hungry. But he did tell me later during dinner (delicious garlic shrimp at China Wok II) that he's worried that I'm working too much. It took me by surprise. I didn't think he really noticed. Not that he's not a devoted husband; he is. But he works on stuff all the time. I figured that if I wasn't working on projects all the time that he would think I was lazy! Well, I guess I know differently now.

But I did get my first promotion postcards designed tonight. I'm currently trying to load the artwork into this blog post but am failing miserably.

I also started a "new line" of stuff for TheCemeteryClub.com store called "Death Becomes You." It features death- and cemetery-related quotes. Fun stuff. The funny thing is that while I knew it was not a really original name for deathly things (most obviously the movie "Death Becomes Her" beat me to it by a number of years), I got an e-mail from the woman who owns BlueLips.com yesterday (the day I set up the new items). Her Web site used to be called--you guessed it--Death Becomes You. So it's a matter of "stealing" from someone without even being aware of stealing from someone. Please don't think me a total dork, Toni! (Everyone, be sure to check out BlueLips.com, it's a great site.)

Well, while I'm trying to pour out my soul and upload a photo here, Shakespeare won't leave me alone. No, the playwrite is not jumping in my lap ... my cat is. She is totally co-dependent. I created a monster 5 years ago, and now we are practically conjoined twins whenever I am home. She is quite jealous of the computer and hates when I type for long periods of time or surf. She also doesn't like it when I spend too much time in front of the bathroom mirror washing my face or something. She thinks that the time I spend doing these things would be much better spent holding her. She is also jealous of our fish tank. It's out of her viewing range for the most part, and she doesn't really know what it is. What she does know is that I will stand in front of it (it's on top of the hutch of our desk) and talk to it occasionally. If she actually knew there was a living being inside the tank (that would be my betta fish Simon LeBon, who is awesome, incidentally), she would probably figure out a way to get into the tank and eat him. Not gonna happen, Shakespeare, you brat.

Hmmm. If I could figure out how to get the photos to upload, I'd put a pic of Shakespeare and Simon LeBon on here. And India, our other cat. And Ghost, my little albino clawed frog I have in a small tank at work. It's the life aquatic with Minda Zissou.

Well, I'm going to post this and then look into the pic issue again.

Good night, all!

Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2005-05-03T15:29:00.000-07:00

Web site updates!

It's Tuesday, May 3, 2005.

I made some Web updates during my lunch break today.

- Subscription information is now available online for "Epitaphs" the magazine!!!

- A new calendar of cemetery events has been posted. Hurray!

So much fun. How can we stand it?

Good news on the book front. I finished two more chapters. It's more than half done now. Actually more than that, as I'm just putting finishing touches on all the chapters at this point. This is great news! This means I can get it to the publisher by the end of this month!

Hurray!!!!!

-Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2005-05-01T14:54:00.000-07:00

Accidents Will Happen

It's May Day, 2005

Normally I put the date in first, but I just realized that the first things you type come up as the title of the post. So I thought this made more sense. Nice to know my brain works sometimes.

So why the title this time? Because on Thursday I was in my second car accident in less than one month. The first was on April Fool's Day (fitting) and was merely a fender bender. Thursday's "bump" was a full on rear end job caused by yours truly. It was a freak thing but stupid nonetheless.

Here's how it went. I was actually leaving on time for work that morning. There was hardly any traffic when I pulled out of our alley. Six blocks later there is a stop light. All of us start going through the light, and we are just through it when the accident happens. I am probably only 20 feet past the intersection when I hit the nice lady in the Lexus. What had happened was that there is a scrap metal place with its entrance within the a block of the intersection. Though I noticed the four cars in front of me, I did not notice the huge scrap truck ahead of them who was turning slooooowly into this place's entrance. In the length of time it took me to get through the intersection and then glance down for a brief moment (was I checking the time? I don't remember) and then look up again, I had just enough time to slam the brakes at about the same time I hit the lady's car in front of me.

Very fortunately, she is okay. And her car is built like a tank. It only got a scuff mark. Not even a dent. My car, on the other hand, is not doing so hot. The fender bender put a big ol' dent in the front corner of my car, and this bump bent the hood a bit (needs to be replaced) and messed up the front of the car. The lights didn't break, but they will need to be replaced. If anyone knows of any Olds Alero hoods that are available, let me know! My repair guy is looking for one. At least the car is drivable right now. But my lights are cock-eyed, so I won't be traveling at night! I'm sure you're thinking, "Damn, good thing! Stay off the road, you crazy driver!" Well, I don't blame you. I hadn't been in a car accident since 1990. Now two in one month. I'm SO glad April is over.

Oh, I didn't mention that I didn't really get too hurt in the accident. I had my seatbelt on, of course. I don't drive without it on. It's the law, and it's also--hello!--super smart. I do have a pretty sucky case of whiplash, though. Good thing my chiropractic team is on the case. I'd be in a lot worse shape by now if were not for Dr. B and my student extern Jason. They are life savers.

The funny thing is that even thought I feel like my brains have been rattled (and beleive me, they have), I finished two more chapters for my book yesterday! I am so close! Chapters are still out with my editors, but I also have at least three more to pass on to them. I want to get this thing to the publisher right away. It's time.

Once I pass it along, the magazine will be my focus. We have had tons of great submissions so far. Our first issue is going to be awesome. We're still shooting for July. I guess it just all depends on any further adventures ... NO MORE CAR ACCIDENTS, THANK YOU!

Well, I'm off to post some stuff on eBay and update my store. On eBay, my username is elfaba1 (that's "elfaba" with a #1, not an "L"). You know how to get to my CafePress store--through TheCemeteryClub.com site store link.

Visit often and buy lots! :-)

Seacrest out,
Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2005-04-26T15:17:00.001-07:00

Today is Tuesday, April 26, 2005

Hello, everyone!

I just got an e-mail from The Writer's Institute in Madison, Wis., and I'm so excited! I went to this two-day conference last year, and it was great. The sessions are very good, and there are plenty of opportunities to network with people.

If anyone is going to be in the area July 21-22 and is interested in signing up, I'm pretty sure I'm going to be there. It would be a great opportunity to network with any taphophiles interested in Epitaphs Magazine and more.

The cost if you sign up by June 27 is only $205. After that, I think it's $225. This is super-cheap for seminars like this one. Hotel rooms are extra.

The Writer's Institute brings all sorts of agents, publishers and authors together in one conference center. I'm including the link to their site below. They offer great programs throughout the year, and some are even online.

http://www.dcs.wisc.edu/lsa/writing/wbtl.htm

If any of you decide to attend, please e-mail me and let me know!

Minda

poetrychick_99@yahoo.com

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2005-04-23T15:59:00.000-07:00

It is Saturday, April 23, 2005

PROCRASTINATION STATION

To all the people I have told throughout my life that I don't like taking naps, today I am a liar. Not only did I sleep in until the ridiculous hour of 11:30 a.m., I also took two incredibly long naps. The truth still is that I do not like naps. I wake up like a lobotomy patient from them. Plus, it's 6 p.m. (CST). My day is shot. Ack.

But it all goes with today's post theme. Procrastination. I have been seeming slacker girl lately. So I'd like to redeem myself with a bit of info regarding what's been going on to make me such a procrastinator.

Work stuff. That's self-explanatory enough. We all have it, and it gets in the way of things. I'm talking my day job stuff. I love my job, though it can be taxing and rather a pain in the butt. We've been dealing with many changes during the past year, and it's been just weird. End of that story.

Health stuff. I was attacked by the plague within the past few months, and it ran me ragged. You probably know what I'm talking about ... the respiratory/flu/cold/nastiness that had taken over for a while. It was the type of being sick where you couldn't do a damn thing to really get over it and could hardly manage to get your daily tasks done, either. So book, Web site and magazine production stuff came to a near stand-still. On top of that, there were some family health scares. All is now well, but it was a little scary for a while. Also not conducive to book writing. Especially when you are writing a book about cemeteries and death. It was a little much for me at the time.

So those were the major things. Then I think I had a "third -of-life crisis" for a few days (I'm only 32). My husband and I and some friends went to see the Duran Duran concert on March 23 (whoa! a month ago today!). It was awesome. LOVED IT! They were just as amazing as I had always hoped they'd be. You see, though they were my all-time favorite band, this was the first time I'd seen them live. I was only 11 or 12 or so when they were huge, and we had no local concert venue of their caliber at the time. I never even thought about being able to see them live. My first concert wan't until years later.

Anyway, we went to see them. They sounded great, looked great. It was GREAT. I loved their new stuff ("Astronaut" is a killer album). I was reliving my music glory days and obsession with my favorite band. I bought a bunch of their CDs and DVDs that I never had growing up. It brought back the glory of the 80s and my best memories of the time for me. It was a blast! Then it started to hit me--this all happened 20 years ago. Twenty!!! Children have been born and raised into adults in that amount of time! My youth has become RETRO!!! I went in to a Hot Topic store at the mall to pick up a few things and saw a couple pairs of earrings for sale that I used to own in the 80s!

Now all of this is not really a big deal. I don't mind getting older. I really don't. Age is just a number and a symbol of pride--it means we've made it. We've made it through another year of change and growth. So this feeling was very different for me. It was probably due to being sick so long with the cold/flu from hell, having a health scare of my own and worrying about the health of my loved ones that got to me. And earlier this year I had knee surgery, so that was making me feel a bit decrepit. Knee surgery at 32, and it's not like I'm a decathalon athlete. My main physical activities include taking morning walks, photographing cemeteries and typing on my computer. What a wild life!

So it was bugging me. I would sit down to work, and have no motivation. I'd force myself, but that's not the way to write. Fortunately, I've gotten over it and have gotten my mojo back. Thank goodness! And then yesterday I realized that this year is my 15th high school reunion ... but I don't mind. I told you I'm over it. And I can hear all of you. "Ooh, 15th. Big deal! I've got my 25th/30th/35th coming up!" Don't worry. I'll get there.

Anyway, here are some updates regarding the book, magazine, etc.

- The book will most likely be out in the fall now. I'm wrapping up each of the chapters right now. Then I will pass it on to my two editors. I was freaking out over it not being "on time," but then I realized that it's no big deal. I'm SELF-publishing, for crying out loud! It's my timeline! In that case, there is no such thing as late. Plus, all my fans will be supportive and wait. ;-)

- The magazine is still plugging along. I'm still receiving submissions and advertisements. Editing will begin very soon. Production is just about ready. We are still shooting for July. Stay tuned! And keep sending us things! We've received great stuff so far!

- The site needs some updates. I plan to add more photos, but this will come once the final photos are selected for "Cemetery Walk." Please be patient. Other updates have been only posted once in a while. Things will pick up soon. Thank you for your support. More is coming soon.

That's what has been going on. Thank you for being so supportive and excited. Even on the tough days, all of you taphophiles keep me going!

All the best to all of you,
Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2005-04-14T06:43:00.000-07:00

It's 4-14-05

It's getting to be a good time of year for taphophiles. The weather is getting warmer, the sun is shining ... and we can now "dig in" at our favorite cemeteries! Warm up those digital cameras and start taking photos, friends! And then submit them to "Epitaphs"! ;-)

Submissions keep coming in. Thank you to everyone who has been enthusiastic about the magazine. It's really keeping me going and inspiring me. Keep it up, everyone!

Since I'm off work for the long weekend, I'll be working on (finishing???) "Cemetery Walk." And doing some spring cleaning. And hopefully some spring unloading. Time to get rid of stuff we don't need. There is a group called Project Renewal that offers after-school programs for disadvantaged children. My plan is to donate a bunch of things to them. Every cent they get donated to them goes to the kids. How great is that?

Time to get to work! Enjoy the day!

Minda

www.TheCemeteryClub.com

2005-04-12T13:24:00.000-07:00

4-12-05

As you can see, I'm trying to figure out how to post photos on here. I'll get it figured out one day. :-)

For now, here is an upcoming event in New England:

Connecticut Gravestone Network Symposium 2005

Saturday – April 23 - 9 a.m. to 3 p.m.

Middlefield Senior Center
405 Main St.
Middlefield, CT

Hosted by The Middlefield Historical Society

Displays & exhibits from various historic groups,and
vendors
with books and cemetery novelties items.

Lecture Topics include:

“Mourning Quilts - Women’s Work: Making Burial,
Coffin, and
Casket Quilts”

“The Portland Quarry in Middletown”

“One of our Colonial Carvers”

“An Introduction to Middlefield History and Their Old
North
Burying Ground”

Lunch-snacks & beverages will be available
Admission: $10 to public $5 for CGN members
Payable at the door

Directions: Middlefield Senior Center, Middlefield, CT
Located off of Rt. 66 between Middletown and Meriden
at the
junction of Rt. 157 & Jackson Hill Rd. - behind the
Firehouse.
Entrance is across from The Congregational Church &
Cemetery

Contact: Ruth Shapleigh-Brown - shapbrown@cox.net
Please address subject line as SYMP INFO

CGN
135 Wells St.
Manchester, CT. 06040-6127
ph: 860-643-5652

For more details go to: www.ctgravestones.com

Flickr

2005-04-12T13:03:00.000-07:00

This is a test post from , a fancy photo sharing thing.